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An awesome alternative to the teenage curfew

Got teenagers? Here’s an awesome alternative to curfew. Post contains affiliate link. 

awesome alternative to the teenage curfew

My oldest child is only 3 years old. But I’m writing this post, see, because I like to plan ahead. Okay, I’m kidding. This was just too good not to share. Plus, I know many of you have older children.

I follow an amazing Christian writer and speaker who is a mama to 4 boys, the youngest now a late teenager.

When I heard her speak in Sydney, Australia I remembered a lot of what she said about spiritual life. But this curfew business was what I thought about for days. Days, see. Why? Because I tend towards worry and it’s genius.

So let’s talk curfew. Most parents put boundaries and parameters on their teenager’s activities both to protect them and teach them responsibility. And as my mother always said…

“Nothing good happens after midnight.” 

Of course that isn’t strictly true. Lots of good things can happen after midnight. But if those things are really good – and good for you – they can probably wait until the light of day. Under supervision. In a group. With everyone wearing True Love Waits rings. Read this on that subject.

The genius alternative (although you could also do this in addition to a curfew) was this.

A kiss good night upon returning home. 

Why this is genius

Oh there’s a few reasons why this is great. If you’ve done your best to train your children in good decision making and wisdom, then at this point you are giving them some freedom to make their own choices. However, there is still oversight.

When they kiss you goodnight you’ll see the time they got home. 

If you go to sleep and they’re still out, then they wake you with a kiss when they get home. There’s no fudging the time and you don’t have to wait up for them just to monitor it. You’ll know exactly when because your bedside clock will tell you so.

Growing Up & Life Transitions

13-18

Healthy Dating Boundaries

This workshop gives you a clear, age-appropriate plan for open convos and healthy boundaries—so your kids feel supported, not smothered. Because when crushes hit, you want to be their go-to, not the last to know.
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You’ll be able to smell them. 

If they smell like alcohol you’ll know they were underage drinking. If they smell like cigarettes you’ll have to give them a four hour slideshow on lungs and addiction. If they smell overpoweringly like perfume, cologne, spearmint, or strong coffee you’ll know they are hiding some other malodorous substance you probably wouldn’t approve of.

Speaking of coffee. She once tweeted that coffee was, yet again, proven to be amazing because research showed coffee drinkers had more “marital relations.” I replied, “Well, what else are they going to do when they’re still awake at 2 am?” Read her book on the marriage story here.

Anyway… another reason it’s awesome is this.

They’ll know they are coming home to you. 

When they know they will be coming home and kissing you goodnight, it is also a heart issue. Your teenagers won’t be able to slink into their bedrooms at 4 am after a night full of bad decisions without having to look you in the eye. When they come in and go to your room and kiss you, their conscience will be very awake.

Of course we cannot and should not micromanage every aspect of our kid’s lives, yet we should provide guidance and wisdom. We train our children up in the way they should go, and then we have to let them go it. But they don’t need to go it alone. No matter what type of curfew, or non curfew, system each family has, one thing is universally true…

Growing Up & Life Transitions

6-12

Puberty Prep

Puberty doesn’t have to be awkward or overwhelming. This workshop shows you how to start open, judgment-free conversations, explain body changes without the weirdness, and give your child the confidence to handle it all. Because when they understand what’s happening, they feel prepared, not panicked.
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Who doesn’t love a good night kiss?

Note: she only shared about the good night kiss upon arriving home, the rest are my own thoughts. 

How to eat healthy again after a binge period

Tips to get back into healthy eating after busy seasons, holidays, pregnancies, etc. and basic thoughts on what to do after binge eating.

How to get back into a healthy eating routine after a binge period

Some people naturally love healthy food and dislike junk. That is so… good for them. Others like having a healthy and balanced diet, but can get easily derailed depending upon their circumstances. That’s how I am! A big move, the holidays, late pregnancy then add a newborn and, well, the diet’s been off.

In an attempt for convenience we’ve eaten things we don’t normally eat more than we should have. Meals once considered “special” became more regular. This is life and sometimes can’t be avoided, but we all suffered. The kids’ tummies were upset (even after the cold and flu attacked the whole house) and I started to feel blah. You know what I mean. Just… blah.

So slowly but surely I’ve been getting us back on a healthy diet. More fruits and vegetables, less carbs and “white foods.” As I’m still plowing through this, I’ve come up with a few ways that we are getting back on track in a way that is sustainable. Because we all know super-crazy-very-difficult-to-continue diets don’t last.

1. Think smart

If you find healthy eating hard, then don’t think you are going to eat only kale and spinach and stick with it. It’s pie in the sky and won’t happen! Sweet-tooths can start by substituting fruit for processed sugary treats. Savory lovers don’t have to cancel pizza altogether, but can make homemade pizzas instead of ordering in.

Think smart about your diet plan, and remember: small baby steps that are sustainable will get you farther than big steps you can’t continue.

2. Get breakfast right

The day has a way of continuing in the same way it started out. And this is not just with breakfast! If the day starts off wonky it is likely to continue that way. If you start off eating junk it’s far more likely you’ll tell yourself, “Oh well, I’ve already messed up today let’s keep the fat and calories coming!” Or maybe that’s just me… Plan your breakfasts smart, and choose foods you will enjoy eating – or at least not totally hate – and then eat a good portion.

If you eat too little (or the wrong foods) you’ll be starving too soon and likely to eat junk food just to make it to lunch. On the other hand, if you start the morning right with something filling that tastes good, you’ll feel better and be more likely to continue the good eating habit throughout the day.

3. Plan ahead

Going to the grocery store without a meal plan is dangerous if you’re trying to eat healthy. Every temptation under the sun will be calling your name, singing to you, and telling you, “It’s okay, I’ll stay in the pantry. You will hardly notice I’m there!” You need to make a list of meals (even vaguely) and know what you want to cook.

Otherwise, you run the risk of returning home with a lot of (hopefully) healthy food yet not have what it takes to make a meal. If you don’t have sufficient food in your home you’re also more likely to order take-out or eat junk food. Your pantry should be stocked with healthy alternatives to help break old habits.

4. Give yourself grace

“Cheat day” is a now household term. It means a day on your diet that you allow yourself to eat whatever you want. I think the generally agreed upon frequency for cheat days is once a week. That means once a week you allow yourself to stuff you face with whatever you want. One day out of 7 won’t set your progress back too far, and will hopefully be enough indulgence to help you sustain your new healthy eating habits.

5. Use a list while shopping

If I don’t go to the store with a list I’m in trouble. All type of things end up in my cart that have nothing to do with anything, and I overspend. I like to make a grocery list that is loosely in the order of my grocery store route. Is that neurotic like hanging your clothes by color? Anyway… when I have a list I can stick to what I’ve written. I very rarely overspend or buy things I didn’t plan for when I follow a list.

When you are attempting to bring healthy eating habits back into your diet, having a list in the store is the only way to go!

A weary mother’s love letter to her pillow

A weary moms love letter to her pillow

The other night while feeding my newborn, I had some pillow talk with… well… my pillow. From one tired mom to another.

Dear Pillow,

Hello lover. Since I was a child I can remember laying my head on you and smiling. Smiling because you take me to my happy place. It’s just so comfortable with you.

But lately, I don’t know… I feel distance. We’ve obviously grown apart and, I feel guilty saying this, I just don’t have time for you right now. But I need you to know… it’s not you, it’s me. I’d blame it on my 3-week-old, but maybe that’s just an excuse. Kids come and they go. Yet you… you’ve always been there. You must know I think about you all the time. I am weary without you.

You are so low maintenance. You don’t need to be fed every 3 hours. You don’t turn into an angry alien from the dwarf planet Pluto when you get incisors. You don’t burden me with your bodily fluids. You just lay there all Tempur-Pedic like. Your love language is gifts. Which works out well for us because my love language is receiving.

Motherhood & Wellbeing

If Mama Ain’t Happy: Boundaries For Moms

Boundaries aren’t harsh or selfish. They protect your energy, peace, and sanity so you can show up as the mom you want to be. This workshop helps you figure out where you need them, set them with confidence, and stick to them without guilt or burnout. Because when you hold your limits, everyone benefits.
Start Now

You kiss my cheeks and tousle my hair and don’t care about morning breath. You don’t throw tantrums, you never tell me “no” and you are always on time. In fact, I lose my sense of time when I’m with you. It’s like we’re in our own world.

Nothing feels as nice as you. Okay, clean sheets feel nice too. Except they must be washed, dried, and put on. Like weekly. Oh and freshly shaven legs are a close second if I’m honest. But let’s face it… it’s winter.

Read: My “Daily Escape” to a Quiet Place & Why It’s Necessary

I daydream about you often. I wonder what it’d be like to drop everything and run away with you for a long uninterrupted weekend. We’ll tell them we didn’t plan it… it just happened. I don’t think they’d be surprised, they know we have a history. Even though another man has come between us now, I promise I haven’t forgotten you. It’s so painful to see you when we can’t be together right now. And by painful I mean I want to be with you so bad I cry sometimes. I thought no one noticed, but today my oldest said I looked weird and that my eyes were all puffy. It’s true what they say. Love hurts.

But one day soon things will go back to normal. I won’t have to slip away in the night to satisfy the hunger of another. No more midnight booty calls to change diapers. Still, no matter what, I’ll always come home to you. Pillow, my undemanding soulmate…

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Weary To Well

This 10-day reset will help you uncover what’s wearing you down (spoiler: it’s not just lack of sleep), set boundaries without guilt, and finally create space to breathe again. Because burnout isn’t your personality—it’s a signal things need to change.
Start Now

Will you wait for me?

a weary moms love letter to her pillow2
Here's the real reason why mothers are so exhausted #mother #parenting #children

Can you run a tight ship and be a free range parent?

If you run a tight ship, but still want your kids to roam wild and free then stick around.

Maybe it’s just at my house, but my kids don’t always do what you say. They aren’t predictable. They don’t always listen to reason. They are little people who are mostly obedient but who sometimes, just don’t give a rip what I say or do.

Boundaries & Behavior

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Discipline with Dignity

Discipline shouldn’t feel like a battle or a shot in the dark. This workshop gives you a clear, balanced plan for setting boundaries that build respect and responsibility—without yelling, harsh punishments, or constant power struggles.
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So that got me thinking…

What kind of mother am I? Not because I need to label myself. Not because I need to fit myself into a movement. But because I only have so much time, energy, and self-discipline each day and I want to put it towards the things that really matter to me. For our family. And I need to figure out just what those things are.

I write about why routine keeps me sane.  I am diligent in creating a good atmosphere for sleep. I am not very spontaneous, and I don’t really like surprises. But does that make me a hovering helicopter mom? Actually no… I don’t think it does. I think it makes me a mom who uses the brain the good Lord gave her.

Daily Routines for Moms

Mom routines that remove 90% of things off your to-do list, give you back control, and help you take CARE of yourself (not just treat yourself)!

Is there balance?

I think I’m not alone in saying we mothers worry we’re getting it wrong. It’s why we judge each other even though we don’t care what the other person does. Schedulers worry they are being too neurotic and laid back moms worry they’re too undisciplined. But wouldn’t it be nice if each family could find a balance that worked? That everyone felt good about?

A balance that didn’t make everyone need caffeine to get to bedtime then sleeping pills to go to sleep?

What matters

I’ve come a long way (in a short time) in my motherhood journey, and I think I’ve found my balance. I’ve realized what I care about and what matters little to me. Where I can focus my energy and where I can save it. I’m not going to lie here, I run a tight ship. Or at least I try. Mostly with our routine, sleep schedules, and discipline. Why? Because I need it to survive. But even so, I don’t hyper-manage their every waking minute.

I care about their character, their heart attitude, and if they listen to me when I’m speaking to them. 

And I’ve stopped stressing over much else.

Connection & Culture

13-18, 6-12

Rooted in Family

Family life shouldn’t feel like a blur of to-do lists that leave you wondering if the memories are even sticking. This workshop helps you define your family’s core values and create simple, meaningful traditions that bring everyone closer without adding pressure.
Start Now

A happy medium

In my home, this is where I’ve come to rest.

Disagreement and discussion are fine, but fighting and defiance are not.

I don’t care if the kids make a mess, but I expect them to clean it up.

I won’t fuss about their choice in outfits, but they need to put clothes on when I say “get dressed.”

They don’t need to finish their entire plate as long as they aren’t being snotty at the dinner table. 

I’m not obsessed with uber early learning and memorization, but we do make reading a big priority. 

They don’t always have to sit still and use “inside voices” but they must to tone it down when I say “Quieter!”

You get where I’m going here. I care that they are kind, respectful, obedient, and make good decisions. I try to train them to make good decisions knowing they’re going to make many bad decisions. After all, that’s part of learning about cause and effect.

So what’s in a label?

My kids are too young to ride their bikes anywhere so I’m not a free range parent, but I think maybe somewhere down the line I could be. Or maybe I think the term free range parent was only invented because we’ve gone so far away from common sense parenting.

So if you, like me, are trying to nail down your proprieties and wonder where everything fits, know this.

You can be the boss in your own house and not be a dictator.

You can expect obedience without being overbearing.

You can teach children self-control and boundaries without coordinating their every move.

You can let them run wild and free without being neglectful. 

And you can let them be independent without being absent. 

Ecclesiastes 7:16-18 says, “Do not be overrighteous, neither be overwise— why destroy yourself? Do not be overwicked, and do not be a fool— why die before your time? It is good to grasp the one and not let go of the other. Whoever fears God will avoid all extremes.”  

 

35 Hobbies For Moms Who Aren’t Crafty

I’ve already posted on hobbies for stay at home moms here. If you are not crafty and don’t give a rip about sewing, here are some hobbies for moms that have jack to do with crafts. After all, if you look at the resume for a stay at home mom, it’s not only fun stuff.

There are people who are crafty and there are people who are not. My post on 60+ hobbies for the SAHM is very popular, but it involves a lot of arts and crafts type stuff. I realized that it is also very Little House on the Prairie and that, perhaps, many mothers out there don’t own a glue gun and will never put that on their Christmas list.

Keep your sanity

Before I make a list let’s recap why it’s vitally important that mothers make time to do things for themselves. Not in a “you deserve it” type of way. But in a “you may lose your mind if you don’t” way.

So… some of these are a little out of the box, but you never know!

Can Be Done At Home

reading (and joining book clubs)

DIY and building projects (amazing site with free plans)

puzzles (here are puzzles of all shapes and sizes)

blogging

cooking + baking

cake making (intro to cake making)

gardening

bonsai trees (Okay, I know, but look at this)

collecting (cool things to collect)

online gaming

start a bunco or bridge group

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Weary To Well

This 10-day reset will help you uncover what’s wearing you down (spoiler: it’s not just lack of sleep), set boundaries without guilt, and finally create space to breathe again. Because burnout isn’t your personality—it’s a signal things need to change.
Start Now

Activity & Athletics

running (5k, half marathons or marathons)

team sports

aerobic classes

Exercise DVDs

tennis

swimming

bicycling

Needs Equipment Or Up-Front Purchases

photography (here’s the kit I bought)

bird watching (don’t laugh, this is very popular!)

canning

horse riding

learning an instrument

sailing (lessons if you don’t own a boat)

take singing lessons

ballroom dancing

Motherhood & Wellbeing

If Mama Ain’t Happy: Boundaries For Moms

Boundaries aren’t harsh or selfish. They protect your energy, peace, and sanity so you can show up as the mom you want to be. This workshop helps you figure out where you need them, set them with confidence, and stick to them without guilt or burnout. Because when you hold your limits, everyone benefits.
Start Now

Adventure

geocaching (beginner geocaching kit)

letterboxing

hiking

rock climbing

water sports

travelling

Random

going to garage sales and flea markets

volunteering

learn a new language (I speak 3)

Mom Problem Solving Worksheet

  • pinpoint an issue
  • draw out how it’s affecting you
  • label what you don’t like about it
  • determine areas of responsibility
  • figure out how it’s showing up
  • say what you’d rather happen
  • brainstorm solutions

Chewing gum and kids (the do’s, the don’ts and 4 awesome gum wrapper crafts)

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Wrigley Jr. Company. All opinions are 100% mine.

If you’ve been asking yourself, “When can my child chew gum?” then keep reading for more do’s and don’ts.

If you've been asking yourself, "When can my child chew gum?" then this is a must read!

Chewing gum is an exciting thing for kids. If I’m honest, chewing gum is an exciting thing for me. Particularly when someone else pulls out a pack unexpectedly and offers to share!

If your children see you chewing gum, and if they can smell it, they will definitely be interested in having some. My older kids (3 and 2) always ask to have a piece of my gum when they can smell it on me! I’ve tested the waters with my oldest and, after researching it a bit, have come to a few conclusion on what we should look out for when it comes to gum and kids.

Do…

  • Wait to offer children gum until they understand it’s to be chewed, not swallowed. This age will change depending on the child, but most agree that around the age of 4 many kids will get the concept.
  • Get sugarfree gum! (Juicy Fruit’s new Starburst flavors smell good and are sugar free). Sugarless gum has actually been shown to fight cavities because it stimulates your mouth to make more saliva which clears out food trapped between the teeth and neutralizes the acids present that contribute to cavities (source.)
  • Let them chew the gum after a meal. If you are out and about and they are not able to brush their teeth, offering a stick (or half) of chewing gum will help get rid of the remnants of lunch (see above point).
  • Offer gum as a fun and special treat, and let them choose their own flavors as part of a reward.

Don’t…

  • Give them gum multiple times a day. Keep it a treat. Doctors suggest chewing gum only once or twice a day for kids is an optimal amount.
  • Swallow. Teach the kids to throw the gum away after they are finished chewing it. Only in rare cases (and with huge quantities) would it block up the intestines, but throwing it in the trash is a good habit to get into.
  • Leaving gum in easily accessible areas will be tempting for younger children who aren’t used to chewing gum or haven’t yet been given the privilege. Keep it hidden where you can find it, but it isn’t in plain sight or small ones.
  • Use gum as a substitute for good dental hygiene.
Read These While You’re At It
DIY pizza box craftsLEGO tips for little onesHow can I keep our home family centered when my whole day is child centered?5 Things You Think Your Kids Can Do That They Can’t — And Vice Versa

And after you’re done chewing…

After your kids are done chewing their gum, here are 4 awesome crafts using chew gum wrappers!

1. DIY purse made out of gum and candy wrappers

2. Starburst wrapper bracelet tutorial (in honor of the Starburst and Juicy Fruit team)

3. A Valentine’s Day wreath out of gum wrappers

4. Gum wrapper chains that you can use for anything you want

As I had just been testing out my oldest child’s readiness for gum (and have always been a Wrigley’s fan) I was happy to partner with Juicy Fruit to promote their new Starburst flavored strawberry and cherry gum you can find in the checkout aisles at your nearest Target (and I am personally for strawberry, what about you?) Save Now at Target!   

star

Starburst_juicy_fruit

Visit Sponsor's Site

5 Phrases To Stop Dinner Time Battles Once And For All

If you’re in the thick of dinner time battles then this is for you. You might also want to read my related helpful phrases posts:

Here’s our basic food routine.

Breakfast: grits, cereal or something random (if we have options they can choose).

Snack: their choice

Lunch: sandwich and fruit (both of which they can choose if we have options)

Snack: their choice

Dinner:  whatever I happen to cook (usually two or three separate foods on the plate)

As you can see, I give my children choices where possible. I remember genuine preferences, and will give dill pickles to those who like them and not force feed those who don’t. I’m a caring mom.

While I’m a fan of letting children make appropriate decisions, and a fan of granting deserved freedoms, a mother of 4 (or 3 or 2 or 1…) can’t cater to every opinion and whim of each child.

My preschooler and toddler will love something one day and snub it the next. There’s no rhyme or reason, and if I played short order cook at every meal I’d end up committed. It’s not practical.

And it’s not good for the kids. 

Here are 5 dinner time phrases that can help stop battles (when practiced with consistency) that will help make dinner run smoothly and cut back on dinner time battles. 

If you have super picky eaters you might want to read Helping Your Child with Extreme Picky Eating or The Picky Eating Solution.

1. “You get what you get and you don’t pitch a fit”

Does this mean your kids can’t have an opinion? No! Does it mean you are force feeding them liver, sauerkraut, and brussel sprouts to prove some point? Obviously not. It simply means that they aren’t allowed to look at their plate and pitch a fit. It’s disrespectful. It’s contagious. And it’s not an appropriate response even if they genuinely dislike the food served.

If your children consistently have contagious meltdowns or throw tantrums at the table, this is a great opportunity to teach them to appropriately release their emotions. It’s not about them pretending they are happy to please you (no way!). But just because they don’t like lasagna doesn’t mean they can cause a scene.

Boundaries & Behavior

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Bye, Bye Backtalk

Backtalk isn’t just annoying—it’s draining, discouraging, and makes even the simplest requests feel like full-blown negotiations. This workshop will give you a step-by-step plan to stop the constant pushback and start building respectful, two-way communication with your kids. Because when you know how to hold boundaries and help your child feel heard, the fight fizzles—and connection takes its place.
Start Now

2. “You have two choices: take it or leave it”

I’m not being cute, this is literal. If my children don’t eat their dinner (aside from one bite) I will keep it out and they can have it as their before bed snack. There is no skipping all of dinner then being given yummy yogurt and strawberries before bed. But, before you send me hate mail, get this… more often than not they’ll jump up to the counter and happily finish their dinner plates.

They can eat what’s been lovingly prepared (by yours truly who does take into account what they like and don’t like) or they can leave it. But there’s no option B or dessert without having eaten. Not because I’m mean, but because life doesn’t always offer you a buffet. And my home is a place of reality.

3. “Taste before you waste”

I don’t think it’s a good idea to make them finish their plate. I had a friend who went to a school where the students were forced to finish their entire plate at lunch. She thinks it contributed to her being unable to recognize and stop eating when she’s full. To her, full = empty plate.

Sometimes my kids clean their plate and other times they do not. I’m not interested in serving sizes. I’m interested in them having a teachable and positive attitude that says, “I’ll try one bite and see if I like it!” If they try it and dislike it that’s okay. If there are 3 items on the plate and they try one bite of each and then stop. Fine. But often they will try it and find they like it. That’s our rule: at least one bite.

4. “It ain’t over ’til it’s over”

Part of the reason children don’t eat what’s on their plate is that they want to get down and go play. They think saying they don’t like it means more TV or iPad time.

I tell my kids if they don’t like what’s on their plate and have eaten their one bite, they still have to stay at the table until dinner is over. Dinner is not over because they rejected my macaroni. Dinner is over when everyone (within reason) is finished.

It’s polite. It’s kind. And it’s good for kids to learn to wait. 

Connection & Culture

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Manners in a Disconnected World

Equipping parents with a simple, consistent approach to teaching and reinforcing good manners so that their child naturally incorporates polite behavior into daily life.
Start Now

5. “Thank the cook before you book it”

My husband has a rule that the kids thank me for cooking and then ask him to be excused. I think it’s very polite for the children to thank the person who spent time, energy, and money preparing food for them. It’s a great habit to get into!

Even if my husband has to prompt the kids, hearing them smile at me and say, “Thank you for dinner, mommy” warms the heart.

Even if they gave my food the stink eye.

And acted like they were gagging when they swallowed their one bite.

And still opted to go to bed without a snack so they didn’t have to finish it. 

::

Kids & the elderly: Why they are good for one another

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Dollar General. All opinions are 100% mine.

If your kids have grandparents or even great-grandparents alive today, how blessed they are! Here are some reasons why kids and the elderly are good for each other, and a gift basket for the elderly you can create with your kids!

It's good for kids to be around elderly people and vice versa. Here are some reasons why it's good to let your kids be around their grandparents and elders.

I was blessed to grow up near my grandparents, and I have a lot of great memories with them. From riding their golf cart to swimming in the pool to going out to dinner with them on Saturday nights. I enjoyed their company and didn’t see spending time with them as a chore, but rather as something I liked to do.

Even if your kids don’t live near their elderly family members, there are still ways to help expose your children to the wisdom of the ages. Whether you encourage interaction at church, visit local members of the community, or do outreach at local nursing homes or retirement centers, the possibilities are endless.

I remember being on a mission trip in high school and visiting various nursing homes doing skits, singing, and visiting. I loved it!

1. Conversation skills

If you are the type of person who can carry on a conversation with people of all ages without awkwardness, you’ll understand what a useful skill that is. I have friends of all ages, and (granted I am a talker…) can genuinely find points of contact and shared interest with those decades older than me.

I believe this is directly tied to my relationship with my grandparents. Children who aren’t around the elderly often can be intimidated by people older than them, and this can put them at a disadvantage when finding a job and navigating life as they begin adulthood.

2. Perspective

Children bring innocence, joy, laughter, and youthfulness into any environment. Why do you think grandparents are so ready and willing to brag about their grand kids? Because the love of young children is rejuvenating! It makes you feel innocent and happy and, if only for a few moments, carefree.

The elderly bring wisdom, experience, and maturity into an environment. Kids are growing up these days with warped views of what the world owes them. They think the world owes them everything when in fact, it owes them nothing. Older people can say things that would get ignored coming from the mouth of a mother or father. Some bits of advice that have stuck with me from childhood came directly from my grandparents.

Connection & Culture

13-18, 6-12

Rooted in Family

Family life shouldn’t feel like a blur of to-do lists that leave you wondering if the memories are even sticking. This workshop helps you define your family’s core values and create simple, meaningful traditions that bring everyone closer without adding pressure.
Start Now

3. A special relationship

Grandparents and other elderly people have the special privilege of being able to spoil without having to worry about the day to day disciplining. This provides a special relationship both for the child and the elderly person. They can do special things, spoil them with sweets, and relate to them in a way that is mostly free from conflict and confrontation.

People – even children – instinctively recognize people of wisdom and character. Letting your children spend time with godly old folks who can share their life experiences is a gift you and your children will forever be grateful for.

4. A look into the past

My grandmother walked miles to school. And both her and my grandfather picked cotton by hand. In fact, my grandfather became a farmer and wouldn’t plant cotton for years (even after the invention of the cotton gin) because he was over it. My grandmother met him at a navy dance and told him if he didn’t ask her to marry him by the time she turned 26 she was “moving to Colorado.” My grandfather was the first person to plant soy beans in the state and his house has a medallion in cement by the power company as the first electric house in the whole county.

My other grandfather was a doctor in the war where he met my grandmother, a nurse. He was asked to be the Surgeon General and even met with the President at the White House a time or two. He delivered most of the babies in our small town. He travelled to Europe on business. Later in life, when he had Alzheimer’s, he often thought we were at a restaurant in Paris.

History is fascinating. Even to a child. Actually… particularly to children.

What’s one way to start? 

One area of ministry in my church that is much appreciated and well done is the “visiting ministry.” We always look for a pastor who likes to visit, and people make an effort to drop in on those from the congregation who are aging or who haven’t been able to come out to church in a while.

When Dollar General approached me to make a gift basket, I knew I wanted to make a winter gift basket for the elderly! Armed with a $30 gift card, I took my 3-year-old and 2-year-old to the store to buy a basket and stuff it full. I wanted it to nod to winter and a general theme, so we chose “comfort” and “purple” as our themes.

Connection & Culture

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Manners in a Disconnected World

Equipping parents with a simple, consistent approach to teaching and reinforcing good manners so that their child naturally incorporates polite behavior into daily life.
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elderly gift basket

The basket, all the goodies, and tissue paper were included in the $30! Oh, plus a Dora balloon and an Elmo balloon for my two shopping troopers. I wanted to stay within the total amount and chose thing of various sizes and function so it would truly feel special for the recipient.

how to create an elderly gift basket

We had a good time putting it together. And by that I mean I tried to put it together and my 18-month-old tried to rip the tissue paper. Anyway, I know it will be good fun delivering it to an elderly person from our church. I have a sewing project for the kids on my list to do that’s way over my head, so we’re going to give the gift basket as a thanks to the lady who is going to help.

DIY gift basket for the elderly

PS – Thanks, Dollar General, for giving me the opportunity to talk about giving and appreciation. Be sure to check out their website! Shop online and save with Dollar General!

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Has motherhood put a damper on your creativity?

Do you ever feel like you don’t have any time to spend on your hobbies and creative pursuits? Has motherhood put a damper on your creativity? If you want to get back creativity, this is for you!

Before having children I had all sorts of hobbies. Oh yes… I was one busy woman. I read books, exercised, redid furniture I found at garage sales, and all kinds of other stuff.

I had the time.

I had the energy.

I had the motivation.

And it felt good!

Then I had a baby. And then I had 3 more. In 3 years. And somewhere along the way, my capacity for creativity died. The desire to be creative and the satisfaction I got from it did not go away, but that former “go get ’em” drive faded more and more with each passing month. I began to feel like all I had time to do was meet everyone’s daily needs and then read a book or watch TV to escape the stress.

Here is how I’ve attempted to remain creative when I really don’t have the time or capacity.

1. Quick and satisfying projects

I sewed a slipcover one time for a horribly ugly couch I bought at good will. I bought the couch because I wanted to sew the slipcover. Shortly after I began to sew that dadgum slipcover I wanted to go quietly into the night and end it all. It took an hour or two each evening for a month. Probably longer because I’d walk past it every day and give it the evil eye but not really sew that much. What’s my point? I did NOTHING else creative the entire time I was trying to do the slipcover because it was an all-consuming project. I should have just bought a nicer couch.

By doing projects that are quick and easy (like this) you are actually able to finish what you start. Busy and trying seasons of life probably aren’t the time to take on an elaborate hobby, but you can always find 15 or 30 minutes. Even if it involves construction paper, which leads me to…

Boundaries & Behavior

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Tech on Your Terms

The “Tech on Your Terms” workshop helps parents create a step-by-step technology introduction plan that aligns with their family values, is age-appropriate, and gradually increases their children’s tech access while maintaining parental boundaries.
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2. Get the kids involved

Sometimes I honestly feel creatively satisfied doing craft time and our Fruit of the Spirit curriculum with the kids. While they are practicing using the scissors or coloring, I will often sit and mindlessly paint, draw, or color shapes. I’m not calling myself Mrs. Henri Matisse over here, but I’ll say it feels good.

Quick sewing projects painting, redoing furniture, and other crafts are usually fun and interesting to children so there’s no need to wait until they’re in bed to get started. In fact, waiting until they’re in bed will likely mean you don’t get around to it!

3. One thing at a time

Just because you used to do many creative pursuits pre-motherhood doesn’t mean you have to attempt them all now. There are seasons and years when you’ll do more than others and that’s okay. That’s life! If you only have limited bandwidth or budget then pick one hobby or creative pursuit at a time. Whether you join an art class or have a craft night at your home, sticking to one thing at a time might help you release some of your creativity without becoming overloaded.

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Self-Care That Sticks

In this workshop, you’ll ditch the “I don’t have time” excuse and build a flexible, doable self-care plan that fits into your real life. Because taking care of yourself shouldn’t feel like another thing on your to-do list.
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If you need to get our creative juices flowing then NOW IS THE TIME! There’s a massively huge and awesome DIY bundle sale going on. Just click below to see over 75 ebooks and ecourses available to you for only $34.95!

Scottish Fiction Must Reads

I don’t keep my love of Scottish fiction a secret. I love clan history, the chivalry, the accent and the names. Here are the picks (both from what I’ve read and researched) of the best Scottish fiction. Post contains affiliate links.

Best Scottish fiction books for women (and not because they're racy)

So, as it says in my about me page, I love me some Scottish fiction. And if our conversations on Facebook are any indication, I think you guys do too. So as a follow-up to my post on must read book series, I’m talking about all things Scotland.

Some of these I’ve read, some my Scottish mother-in-law spoke highly of, and others just stood out in research, but I’ll tell you I am pumped to finish off this list.

Individual Novels

 

Thorn in my Heart (series)

This is an awesome Christian series loosely based on the story of Jacob, Leah and Rachel from the Bible. My whole house went to pot reading these because I seriously couldn’t stop. Even Francine Rivers said she “couldn’t put it down.” That’s pretty much all you need to know.

1. Thorn in my heart
2. Fair is the Rose
3. Whence Came a Prince
4. Grace in Thine Eyes

Outlander (series)

It’s a love story and a war story and a history lesson and completely and utterly addictive. The books span decades and travel across continents. (Note: there are some intimate scenes that, while not lewd, are what I’d call “raw and emotionally graphic.”)

1. Outlander
2. Dragonfly in Amber
3. Voyager
4. Drums of Autumn
5. The Fiery Cross
6. A Breath of Snow and Ashes
7. An Echo in the Bone
8. Written in My Own Heart’s Blood

44 Scotland Street (series)

The book tells the story of a group of neighbors living in Scotland. From one mother who has a young son she forces to learn the saxophone and Italian to athletes, widows, and artists. It was first published in a weekly column before being turned into a book. I’ve only read the first book in this series (at the time I didn’t know it was a series) and I laughed the whole way through.

1. 44 Scotland Street
2. Espresso Tales
3. Love Over Scotland
4. The World According to Bertie
5. The Unbearable Lightness of Scones
6. The Importance of Being Seven
7. Bertie Plays the Blues
8. Sunshine on Scotland Street
9. Bertie’s Guide to Life and Mothers

the best Scottish fiction books

Book series you absolutely must read including historical, mystery, christian, childhood favorites, fantasy and romance. Great for women, mothers, and young girls and boys too

Being a mom is tiring… want to know the surefire secret to less stress?

There is a secret to less stress in motherhood and it’s probably one you’ve not heard of. Instead of worrying about every little thing, try this.

With our first children we are often extremely paranoid.

Worried.

Very careful to make sure they look perfect, sleep perfect, and have the best of everything.

We follow the letter of the law (whichever law we subscribe to) and plan matching outfits and wonderful baby books and make all their baby food homemade.

We take great care.

And then we have more children….

Some mothers are pleasantly surprised that more kids doesn’t equal more stress. At least not at first.

Some mothers find the opposite, in fact.

Here’s my secret to less stress….

Read my graphic below to get my super secret – and probably not obvious – secret to less stress in motherhood and parenting.

Being a mom is exhausting. Heres the secret to less stress as a mom

Do you only have one child and feel very stressed?

Whether you have kids spaced far apart or close together might not matter as much as you think. What MIGHT matter is how having multiple kids encourages you to let go of some control.

To stop taking things so seriously.

To relax more and not take things personally.

To realize you can’t control a lot of things so you learn to let things go and become a less stressed and discouraged mama.

Tips for people with multiple children close in age

If you’ve got a few kids all close in age, these posts will help you.

The key, of course, is a good routine, clear boundaries, and lots of love and a sense of humor.

And here are some posts about having babies close together, if this is your method for reducing stress. Ha!

Family Practices & Contribution

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Sticky Routines System

Giving you a step-by-step guide to overcome barriers and stick to the healthy routines you’ve committed to. Learn the mindsets and secrets disciplined moms use to run a tight ship🚢 (think, mornings, chores, homework, bedtime, self-care, etc.)
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Why having more kids can make you less stressed

The truth is having more kids can obviously be more stressful. You have more mouths to feed and more bottoms to clean and less time to yourself.

One on one time with your kids is harder to come by and you may feel more guilt for not having as much time with each child.

However, ,if you let it, having more children can help you to relax. It can help you to – like organized moms everywhere do – major in the majors and minor in the minors.

You will learn firsthand that what most kids want is just a present parent. Because you just won’t have time to actually cater to all your children’s every need, you’ll see what things really end up mattering and which don’t.

You’ll see that a lot of the things you did because you thought it mattered to your child, you’ll find out it really only mattered to you.

Self-Care Routine Tracker

Do you forget to sleep, bathe, eat, relax, etc.? NO MORE. This tracker will help you consistently live within your limits so you have more love to give to your family.

The real way to be more at peace as a mom

So whether you have one child or you have a dozen, the real path to peace is in knowing there’s someone in control smarter than you are.

Doing the best you can each day and then being okay with what you’ve done.

After all, life’s not like a photograph, it’s like a video.

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Self-Care That Sticks

In this workshop, you’ll ditch the “I don’t have time” excuse and build a flexible, doable self-care plan that fits into your real life. Because taking care of yourself shouldn’t feel like another thing on your to-do list.
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What expecting mothers need for the newborn phase

I’m 36 and a half weeks pregnant with my fourth child and, while there aren’t many big necessities looming, there are definitely some expecting mother must haves on my list. Here’s how to help you get what you need to help survive the newborn phase.

I am not a big collector of stuff. I don’t think I need a lot. I don’t hoard. I like to buy, use, consume, and then either donate or throw away.

However, there is just no denying that the arrival of a new baby brings with it certain needs. In order to fully enjoy those first few weeks and months, it’s best to be prepared and have what you need on hand.

Registries are a great way to ensure that you get all you need, and have something to refer your loved ones to who are looking to help get your family ready for the baby’s arrival.

Particularly if you are a new mom and have a few showers lined up, creating a registry at an easily accessible store is pretty much the easiest way to go about it.

Related Reads:

Expecting mother must haves for the yummy newborn phase

So without further ado, here’s my must have list. There are other things, but after 3 babies (in my humble opinion) these are the essentials.

For nursing

1. Lansinoh. This is pretty much the best thing you can get if you plan on breastfeeding. To prevent cracking, soreness and discomfort (and to heal it) this lanolin cream is recommended worldwide. I’ve had 3 babies in 3 countries and yet to find anything better.

2. Nursing pads. Breastfeeding takes some adjustment. Both in getting your rhythm down and in milk supply between the baby and the mother. Unless you want everyone you meet to know you breastfeed because – well – it shows, then you’ll need nursing pads.

3. Nursing tank tops. Not all clothes are created equal during the breastfeeding phase. Nursing tops are a huge convenience while you’re still getting used to everything.

4. Burp cloths. I always seem to think I don’t need these Then I end up going through two or three shirts a day. Or I don’t… and that’s even worse.

5. Breastfeeding friendly bottles. Though you’ll be primarily breastfeeding, it’s a good idea to introduce the bottle to your baby earlier rather than later. You may not need this, but if you will have to be away from your baby from time to time longer than a few hours it’s good to have the right bottle and know how to get a breastfed baby to take a bottle. 

Read These While You’re At It
How I Beat My Postpartum Sugar AddictionBaby gifts for friends who have everythingIs sleep a priority for you?A weary mother’s love letter to her pillow

For mommy

5. Eye mask. Hopefully in the initial phase after birth you’ll have some help around you. That means you’ll probably be feeding, changing diapers, and sleeping. An eye mask is a great way to help you get some sleep even if you have to catch it at noon. I was given an eye mask with my first pregnancy and have never looked back.

6. Night gown and robe. Whether you wear this in the hospital or in the first week at home when you don’t leave the house much, a new nightgown has a way of making you feel better. Instead of a ratty college t-shirt (not that there’s anything wrong with that) you’ll at least feel less guilty that you didn’t get dressed all day.

7. Favorite snacks. When you’re nursing or spending time cuddling your newborn, snacks are a good thing to have on hand if you don’t feel like preparing a whole meal. I always want a nice drink and something yummy when I sit down for a feed.

8. Comfy intimates. After birth you’ll likely not fit into your 40 week panties, nor fit back into your pre-pregnancy ones. I’ve found the best way is to buy intimates especially for this period that are comfortable. Nursing bras and underwear in your “new, but hopefully not for long” size help you to remain comfortable.

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Weary To Well

This 10-day reset will help you uncover what’s wearing you down (spoiler: it’s not just lack of sleep), set boundaries without guilt, and finally create space to breathe again. Because burnout isn’t your personality—it’s a signal things need to change.
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For baby

9. Diapers and wipes. Diapers are obviously a must have. Even if you plan on doing cloth diapers, that doesn’t usually get started until around 3 months so you’ll want a big stash. In my registry I included Pampers® Swaddlers. When people pick up diapers for us they always seem to ask which brand, so it’s a good idea to know what you like so you get diapers you’re happy with.

10. Swaddle. You gotta swaddle that baby. From day one! This is my favorite swaddle I’ve used with all four babies. I know some mamas say their babies didn’t like to be swaddled, but I swaddled all mine from birth and they’ve loved it. Every one. Plus it really helps in establishing good sleeping patterns with newborns.

Read: Cocooning a Newborn & 7 Reasons Why it Can Be Good For The Family

11. Car seat. Depending on how long ago you had your last child – and definitely if you’re a first time mom – you gotta have a car seat. Requirements often change so it’s best to be sure that the one you have meets safety requirements and, if not, to upgrade.

12. Pack-n-play. Each family is different, but I always keep our baby in our room until they are sleeping through the night. This occurs sometime between 3-4 months. Because I usually have their crib in their own room, we keep a pack-n-play in our room where the baby sleeps through the night. This is also great for when you are away, or when you’d like the baby to be able to nap well at someone else’s home.

Read: What To Do When Baby Is Feeding Every Hour (& Not Sleeping!)

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Parenting in Hard Times

Parenting through a crisis feels heavy—but you don’t have to do it alone. This workshop gives you a clear plan to bring stability, emotional safety, and strength to your family when life gets shaky. Because in hard times, your kids need a steady, loving guide.
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