All Posts

A Life-Changing Phrase to Banish Mommy Guilt

Mom guilt and FOMO pressure are so strong for mothers everywhere. This phrase is something to tell yourself when you start getting confused.

I love hearing what other mothers do for inspiration and wisdom. I don’t, however, love feeling guilty, inadequate, or sub par.

Want to know something?

It’s usually us that makes ourselves feel guilty, inadequate or sub-par. I recently read a quote that I believe will help us shed some of the guilt and pressure we put ourselves under.

Other people’s problems are not your problems

Just because someone else is bothered by a certain behavior in their home, doesn’t mean you have to be.

Let’s talk about some gray areas and how to shed unnecessary mom guilt.

I believe that most mom guilt doesn’t come from the blatantly obvious problems…

Obviously, there will be times when something is a problem even if we pretend it isn’t (like the effect of consistently eating unhealthy foods).

“It’s only a problem if it’s a problem to you” deals not with the black and white situations in life, but instead with the areas where we may be heaping on extra burdens.

So, in what ways can we use this phrase to help us shed some of the burdens off our shoulders? Let’s hash it out!

There are 4 areas of your life to lose the mom guilt…

So many mother’s fall into a comparison trap when it comes to raising children. It goes without saying that there is more than one way to care for a baby.

Let’s evaluate 5 areas that I feel mom’s fall into mom guilt and how to use the life changing phrase- “It’s only a problem if it’s a problem for you.”

Mom and baby are laying on bed together. Mom does not have mom guilt.

#1 How you feed is up to you

First of all, understand that other mothers love to offer “helpful” advice about feeding.

Secondly, you need to know that’s it’s up to you! You can breastfeed or bottle feed. You can start rice cereal at 5 months or skip it and introduce solids at 7 months. There are many ways to feed your kids, and it’s okay to pick what suits you best.

I like to hear how others do it, and often use their experiences as examples or to problem-solve.

For example, if nursing on a schedule is causing you major stress, then do what works for you.

Take my case for example… all my babies have had fast metabolisms (as do my husband and myself)!

So… by 5 months they were sucking rice cereal down like a banana strawberry smoothie with coconut flakes! By 6 months they were eating more than I was. Okay… that’s a slight exaggeration (but only slightly).

Remember…

The truth is, hearing how someone else does something doesn’t mean you have to do that.
Don’t feel guilty about doing it differently.
You shouldn’t feel compelled to do what your neighbor does!

⭐ Eating or feeding habits are only a problem if they’re a problem for you.

If you are deep in overwhelm and need to brainstorm to Get Out then try this overcoming overwhelm packet. It’ll give you big changes quickly!

#2 How you sleep train (or don’t)

In my research, I found that many women want their babies to sleep longer stretches. In fact, that may be why you found my blog in the first place!

For some, having a 6-month-old who wakes 4 times a night to feed is a problem. They get some tips, advice, and thoughts and then go make their own decision.

As discussed earlier, how you sleep train (or choose not to) is up to you! Don’t let the comparison of yourself to others trap you into a cycle of mom guilt about your baby’s sleeping habits.

If you co-sleep, are completely against cry-it-out, and don’t mind waking up multiple times to feed because you see it as bonding, then go on with it! If both you and your baby are content and fine with the arrangement, there’s nothing more to say.

⭐ Sleeping habits are a problem if they’re a problem for you.

Motherhood & Wellbeing

13-18, 6-12

Healthy Minds, Happy Homes

Taking care of your mental health shouldn’t feel like another chore. This workshop shows you how to build simple, sustainable routines that support your well-being and your kid’s emotional health—without the stress or overthinking.

Start Now

Little girl is sticking our her tongue and there's no mom guilt from the parent.

#3 Discipline behaviors that matter to you

Some mothers will require or restrict certain behaviors that you won’t. On the flip side, some mother’s will be more flexible with their children’s behaviors.

Although both may seem “off” to you…everyone is different.

In my case, I am fairly sensitive to my physical environment. Because of this, I dislike loud noises, background music, or persistent sounds. I perceive this as negative. Therefore, I absolutely cannot stand whining and screaming.

Not because of a moral issue, but because my heart begins to beat out of my chest. When there’s too much noise all I want to run for the hills. I do everything I can to eradicate these noises.

Here’s my point…

Just because something bothers me, doesn’t mean you have to have that tendency with your kids.
Something that may be problematic for you, may not bother someone else.
Take what you learn from someone, and use it as a resource if you need to.
One key way to loose mom guilt is to realize that all mom’s will handle certain things differently…and that’s ok!

⭐ If the behavior is amoral and non-destructive, it’s only a problem if it’s a problem for you.

#4 How you structure your day

I write a lot about routine and schedules, and I firmly believe they work well in any home.

Do I think every home should have one? Well, only if you want one!

When it comes to strutting the day, some people are fine getting up at 5:30am (God have mercy on those kind souls), some are happy to go with the flow, and some like fairly detailed routines and structure.

There’s no one size fits all.

You and a friend may do things completely different… and both raise well-adjusted happy children. Unfortunately, (or perhaps fortunately) there’s no guaranteed formula in parenting.

⭐ One thing is for sure, holding onto mom guilt doesn’t help anyones style of parenting.

And it’s a great way to get stretched too thin.

Practical advice about structuring your day…

Your preferred schedule is not going to match exactly with anyone else’s in the world.
Researching and getting advice is very helpful! Pick and choose what works for you. Try some things out…
Don’t be afraid to be flexible. Different season’s of life require different things.
Loose the mom guilt about keeping a schedule just like someone who looks like they “have it all together.”
Just do what works for you!

⭐ If you are more stressed with a routine than without, don’t create a problem by trying to stick to one.

Family Practices & Contribution

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Smooth Start Morning Routines

Mornings don’t have to feel like a mad dash of lost shoes, whining, and cold coffee. Here’s a simple, no-nag plan to get kids up, ready, and out the door on time — without the rage.

Start Now

Mom is a without mom guilt as she hugs her two kids.

What actually works for you?

If you see what a friend does or read articles that talk about things you never thought of, the pressure and guilt can enter in.

Sometimes… this is a sign that change may need to happen. Sometimes it’s a sign of nothing.

When I begin to think, “Oh my goodness should I do that?”… I evaluate my feelings.

Am I filled with peace and encouragement?
Do I feel guilty and heavy?

Depending on how I answer… I will either implement that in my home or repeat this phrase….

It’s only a problem if it’s a problem for you…

Sources:

Relationship Building Questions To Ask Kids (With Printable!)

These are excellent questions to ask kids to help them open up, learn more about each other, and really build the parent child relationship.

We are huge fans of talking around here.

I, in fact, hardly ever shut up.

It’s no surprise that my children – all 5 of them – also talk a lot. With 7 people in a home it can be hard to get a word in. So one thing we like to do to make sure each child gets to share… is take turns with questions.

At the dinner table, we will go around with fun questions or trivia and let each child talk.

They love it and we feel we get to know them more and more!

Parents are sitting at the table with kids asking them questions to ask kids.

Remember… these are relationship building questions when you are trying to have a conversation.

If you are trying to get information from your kids because they’re clammed up… I recommend statements, not questions.

Questions to ask children who are shy

No matter how talkative kids can be when playing and goofing off, some will be shy when asked questions directly.

Believe it or not, I was like this as a kid. I had to be “pushed” a bit to open up.

It’s important to give your shy kids opportunities to share out. Be sure to include them in your family discussion time. Here are some questions that can help:

What is your favorite outside toy or game?
Do you have a favorite inside toy/game? Why?
If you could be any animal, what would you be?
What is your favorite day of the week? Why?
Tell me about your favorite food.
If you could only see in two colors, what colors would you choose? Why
What was the most fun thing that you did today?
What do you love about your life?
Can you tell me about time that you were really happy?
If you could have any superpower what would you choose and why?
If you could visit any place in the world, where would you go? How would you get there?

Silly questions that will get everyone giggling

I absolutely love rolling with laughter at the table with the family. How cool is it going to be for my kids to look back on this time and remember how much they giggled and laughed!

Here are some questions to get everyone enjoying their family time together:

Turn the numbers of your age around. How would you talk if you were that age?
If you could be invisible for one day, what would you do?
If you could eat one thing every day for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Would you rather swim with a shark or a crocodile?
Pretend that you have a pet parrot. What would you teach it to say?
If you could switch places with me for a day, what would you do?
What do you think animals say?
What is your favorite method of laughing?
If you were a teacher, what would you teach your students?
What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you?

Dinner table questions… choose this or that

My kids love This or That questions! They often ask for these questions before any of the others. In fact, they love hearing what their siblings and we have to choose for an answer.

You’ll be surprised how good of a listener they become and how much they begin to love hearing about each other.

Would you rather be incredibly smart or hysterically funny?
Would you rather live in the city or on a farm?
If you could choose, would you rather be 5 years older or 5 years younger?
Would you rather be an astronaut or an ocean scuba diver?
Is it better to be too hot or too cold?
Would you rather have a tall neck like a giraffe or a long nose like an elephant?
If you could choose, would you rather be a captain of a ship or pilot of an airplane?
Would you rather be able to understand what animals are saying or have them understand you?
For a trip, would you rather go to the beach or the mountains?
For a treat, would you rather eat cake or ice cream?
Would you rather be able to breath underwater or fly?

Questions to ask your kids about their life away from you

Remember, this isn’t prying… but simple parenting skills. Not every kid is the same, some need to be asked to share experiences before they will open up about a time they were away from you.

One of my younger boy’s specialty is to share something about a trip he went on with a family member years ago. I’m not sure why he chooses to share these memories years later or even how he remembers them… but I’m always glad when he remembers and shares.

It’s like if I never would have asked, he would never have shared…

What types of snacks and foods did you eat?
Did you feel completely safe and comfortable?
Was anyone there that you didn’t know?
How much time did you spend indoors/outdoors?
What is your favorite thing to do with your friends?
Was there any arguing with your friend/cousin going on?
Tell me what you love most about being there?
Is there anything that you don’t like about being there?
Was there ever a time where you wanted me to come get you?
Was the adult available and around all of the time?

Q’s about kids’ dreams and the future

Don’t spend all of your time on questions to ask your kids that are just for fun. Use this time to grow with them.

Not only is this a great opportunity to share, but it’s also a great opportunity to teach listening appreciation and acceptance of different viewpoints.

We all want out kids to be supportive and appreciative when hearing others dreams. Guess what?

This doesn’t always come natural… the discussion that comes with the following questions will lead itself to opportunities to teach and model.

What is your biggest dream?
Can you tell me is something that you’re really good at?
What is the best part of your day?
Tell me something that you’re really looking forward to.
Can you think of something that you really want to learn how to do?
Is it more important to be rich or kind?
When do you feel the most proud to be you?
What do you think is the best part about getting older?
What would yo most like to be? Why?
What do you think your lie will be like ten years form now?

It’s ok if you bounce around these questions and not have lengthy discussions each night at the dinner table.

However, you’ll find that gearing your family’s conversation in directions that cause you to get to know them and teach values will be rewarding.

Parental Authority: The Benefits Of Limits From Nurturing Parents

This day in age many parents have traded their parental authority for permissive parenting, worrying only about their kids’ emotions.

Sometimes it seems confusing to know just how a mother should be…

On one hand, she wants to raise independent children. On the other hand, she wants her children to feel heard and accepted for who they are.

There are many expectations that she gives herself. Such as, not barking orders all day, not being to permissive, or running a lawless home. She wants to live and make decisions in the moment but also be wise at big picture thinking.

Mom and child are sharing a hug after mom shows parental authority.

What is Parental Authority?

Sometimes I think we aren’t ever fully ready for the responsibility that being a mother gives us. I don’t necessarily want the buck to stop with me every time. We find ourself thinking, I don’t always want to make every decision.

Some may think “I like to let the kids do what they want… and hope it works our for the best.” Except, normally, that just doesn’t work.

As parents we are given authority over our children and our household. We are older, wiser, and more mature than our children. We understand cause and effect and sowing and reaping in ways they simply cannot.

For those reasons, we can’t shy away from our job…

Note: I know an employer/employee relationship is fundamentally different than a parent/child relationship as one is contractual and performance-based and the other is relational and position-based.

Don’t send me hate mail yet, just work with me here…

So… how is being a mom (or a dad) like being a boss in a good way?

Read: Quiet time (Rest time) for Toddlers: All You Need to Know

The Boss Covers

I worked in the marketing department for a Christian non-profit organization, and one of my duties was to send out the monthly newsletter to thousands of subscribers.

For one such newsletter, I interviewed a man from Africa. He claimed to be a bishop from Uganda, and went on to explain why he was furthering his training in the UK.

After the newsletter came out, my boss had quite a few people respond that he was not, in fact, a bishop at all. I had assumed he was telling the truth, but hadn’t fact checked. I was shame-faced before my boss for my lack of diligence. Do you know what he said?

Not “You’re fired, you stink, or you made us all look bad.”
Nope. He said, “Rachel, the buck stops with me and I approved your work before it went out. I’m not throwing you under the bus here, we’ll sort it out together.”

Like bosses, parents cover their children. They watch how they are learning, progressing, and where they thrive and don’t thrive.

They don’t leave the children thinking they must do it alone, fight battles alone, or face the world unsupported. Great parents help their children to feel they are free to shine and free to come in for refuge.

Young boy is sitting in car thriving under parental authority.

The Boss Empowers

Bosses generally have more experience, knowledge, and hands-on training than their employees. They can carry heavy loads, manage multiple things at once, and help keep the business or organization moving toward its goals.

A boss also empowers their employees in their growth…

To empower means to make someone stronger and more confident. A good boss does just this. Good parents do this too!

Furthermore, they praise milestones, progress, and successes. They help pick up those under them when they fail, struggle, or can’t see the way through.

The truth is…children naturally look up to their parents. Just like the saying goes- “they think that they hung the moon.”

This places parents in the perfect position to…

Nurture self-confidence
Build self-esteem
Encourage them to rise to challenges
Expect them to contribute
Praise their efforts

Parental authority, like a boss…is not like running a dictatorship. In contradiction, parental authority is allowing the parent to be a child’s greatest champion.

Mom is showing correct parental authority by helping boy try a new food.

The Boss Promotes

We are often unable to see our own abilities and strengths clearly. I often think I’m good at things when I’m not. Also, I think I’m hopeless at things where I’m not. Left to my own devices, I don’t know when I’m ready for a new challenge.

Bosses see growth in their employees and know who is capable of handling more weight and responsibility, and who isn’t. Parents practicing parental authority do the same.

If a child is left to rule the roost, they’ll promote themselves to President before they were even elected Mayor. Promotions and advancements are best left to those who are more mature.

Undoubtably, the consequence of letting your children make important decisions on their own will build false self-confidence and insecurity.

Parents have the privilege of seeing their children grow in self-control. Also, we have the ability to help them grow in wisdom and skill. These things take giving them ample opportunity to grow and mature in a healthy way.

The Boss Sees the Big Picture

Employees lower down on the ladder often question upper management’s decisions. They may say: “I wouldn’t do it that way” or put their own ideas in. Unfortunatly, They are only thinking about the bottom line.

The fact is, bosses see the big picture and make decisions accordingly. They have an aerial view.

For example, a helicopter above the freeway system they see the upcoming curves, accidents, and traffic jams. The employee below, in a Toyota Camry, is not able to get a full picture and make a wise decision based on all the facts.

Parental authority is seeing the big picture and making the important decision…

Want to know why? It’s simple! Children live and think in the now. That is okay. In fact, it is right.

It’s a blessing and joy to enter into the now with them! But, they shouldn’t be given reign to make important decisions when they simply aren’t able to understand the facts and consequences.

Teaching them consequences and how to see the big picture is our job as parents! But, to let them make decisions they are not equipped to make is not training, it’s negligence.

Parental Authority is a Blessing

So, while I know the relationship between a boss and an employee is fundamentally different from the relationship between a parent and child, I hope you get my point.

Here’s a few things to consider:

Children want to be in charge. That doesn’t mean they should be!

They will push the envelope against your authority. Developmentally, that is natural. It doesn’t mean you should absolve your role.

They challenge you because they want to know you are ultimately in control. That brings safety, not fear.

If you’ve noticed your home environment is slipping into one of chaos, disobedience, and rebellion… ask yourself these questions:

Where have you perhaps given authority to your kids when they can’t actually handle it?
Are they “wise in their own eyes?”
Have they promoted themselves beyond their capabilities?

It’s not about being a dictator or everyone around. In contradiction, it’s about maintaining your position of leadership so you can allow your children to thrive.

This Is What’s Really Happening When Your Kids Are Defiant

Inside: Here is how to decipher whether your child is being defiant or if you have an underlying problem on your hands. If you have a defiant kid, stick around.

My sweet 3-year-old middle child was no longer himself.

He was… how shall I say this… a worse version of himself.

Instead of smiling and charming the pants off of me and everyone around us, he’d turned sullen. Whiney. Extremely emotional and resistant to nearly all of my instruction.

At first I was at a loss. What on earth was going on? Was it the terrible 3’s or a stomach ache? Was it some wonder week or result of a shift in routine?

Whatever the reason, I saw it as a challenge…

I wasn’t about to lose this battle to my 3 year old.

My Type A-ness kicked in. If my kid thought he was going to fight my every instruction and get away with it, well, he had another think coming!

So I did what many other mothers would do in my situation… I tightened the consequences. I thought I’d reign him in.

The plan was to tomato stake him and we’d get to the bottom of this whole defiance issue. After all, I loved this baby more than words and didn’t want him growing up entitled with a bad attitude.

Well…

You are probably smarter than me. You may not be surprised at what happened next.

It was a dismal failure.

It Just Got Worse…

His defiant kid behavior did not improve. In fact, it simply got worse. He became more emotional, volatile, and confounding.

I wondered if I was being too strict…or perhaps too lenient. Did he feel unloved? If so then why didn’t our individual time together seem to help the issue?

Around this same time I was doing Love and Logic® parenting training and I had an epiphany. An epiphany that turned things around nearly immediately.

As soon as I finished the lesson I sat back in my chair and let it sink in. There was a clear reason my son was fighting my instructions, commands, and our family rules.

There was a reason he was being a defiant kid. He wanted to do anything except that which he was told to do. And it was more than just an instinctual reason. And the reason was this…

He felt powerless.

The Need For Control

Control is a basic human need. The desire for it is so strong we’ll do nearly anything to regain that sense of control.

When we feel powerless, we attempt to exert our power in any way we can. Children: by tantrums, being a defiant kid, meltdowns, procrastination, or defiance. Adults… in similar but perhaps more “adulty” ways.

Share control when you don’t need it so you can get some back when you do. Love and Logic®

As I learned and observed, I realized that my dear middle son didn’t get to choose games with the older kids, and the younger ones are too little to fall under his leadership. This was causing him to be a defiant kid.

On top of that, mommy and daddy wanted him to do “This and That and The Other” and it all added up to a sense of powerless.

I hadn’t been giving him enough healthy and age appropriate choices.

He’s too young to control his daily routine, his meals, or his life direction, but he’s surely old enough to make decisions throughout the day that give him back a sense of control.

I wanted to lessen the power struggles between us while still maintaining our family boundaries.

How to Give Away Control You Don’t Need

Turns out, “giving away control” is a fairly easy to do. These tips should give you an idea of how to do this and change your defiant kid:

Give Choices You are Okay With

Throughout the day, make deposits into your child’s power bank. Every choice you give your child becomes another deposit in your child’s sense of control.

“Would you like a red plate or a blue one?”

“Do you want to read 1 book or 2?”

“Should we go inside now or in 5 minutes?”

Give two options that are both okay. You are not stretching your boundaries, but your child feels powerful.

Read: The Surprising Reason Our Kids Are Insecure

Boundaries & Behavior

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Discipline with Dignity

Discipline shouldn’t feel like a battle or a shot in the dark. This workshop gives you a clear, balanced plan for setting boundaries that build respect and responsibility—without yelling, harsh punishments, or constant power struggles.

Start Now

Provide Choices Before Your Child Gets Resistant

Throughout the day – any time you think of it – give choices to your child.

The more deposits you make into your child’s power bank throughout the day… the less resistant they’ll be when you don’t allow them to choose.

Tips on Giving Choices to Help Defiant Kid

Give choices that you’re ok with… such as what shoes they should wear, picking their clothes, or which toy to play with.
Start by giving two choices for your child. If they haven’t chosen within 5 to 10 seconds, choose for them and move on.
Add more varied choices as he/she gets used to your limits. This will help your child learn how to be decisive and it communicate your limits.
If you’re child is resistant on choosing between the choices you give him/her say something like this:

“Would you like to go to bed now or in 2 minutes? You don’t ever want to go to bed? I’m sorry to hear that, we’ll go now.”

When we provide choices before a child becomes resistant, we share healthy control. When we provide choices after they complain or resist, we reward them for complaining and resisting. Love and Logic®

Once your child has become a defiant kid and is demanding to do their own thing, offering choices then becomes a power struggle.

At this point you can enforce a family consequence and move on. Then, when the time of conflict has passed, continue giving choices.

Read: 32 Consequences Moms Can Use For Negative Behavior

Boundaries & Behavior

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Bye, Bye Backtalk

Backtalk isn’t just annoying—it’s draining, discouraging, and makes even the simplest requests feel like full-blown negotiations. This workshop will give you a step-by-step plan to stop the constant pushback and start building respectful, two-way communication with your kids. Because when you know how to hold boundaries and help your child feel heard, the fight fizzles—and connection takes its place.

Start Now

At First I felt Ridiculous…

I immediately began giving my son choices. Choices about how many books to read (3 or 4?). Choices about which clothes to wear (soft shorts or jean shorts?). I felt ridiculous and silly for the first few times until I looked in his eyes...

He was beaming.

3 choices was all it took for him to go from screaming at bedtime to getting calmly into bed and asking for a kiss. It has worked ever since! When I give him a choice he looks me directly in the eye, smiles, and makes his choice. He feels a sense of control over his own life.

He’s no longer acting out to prove a point.

All of the melting down and throwing tantrums have stopped.

He is a happy child again.

And all it took was sharing some control with my son.

“Sharing control within firm limits teaches wisdom and responsibility.” Love and Logic®

Why You’ve Got An Angry Baby — And What To Do About It

Babies were supposed to coo and smile, right? If you’re wondering why you’ve got an angry baby on your hands, here are a few big reasons.

I’ll never forget when my oldest child started being so angry, around 12 months old.

I lived in Australia at the time, and called my mom back in Florida. I told her I was certain that my beautiful baby went to sleep happy then woke up hating me.

It wasn’t like she was more whiny than normal, because that is pretty easily linked to lack of sleep or proper routine.

No… she was straight up angry.

This went on a few weeks. Turns out, she had a food sensitivity and the milk was upsetting her tummy. But, for many moms with their angry babies, it isn’t about food sensitivities.

Look, when babies are well fed, well-rested, and not over-stimulated they are generally not angry, so THERE IS HOPE.

Read on for strategies to turn your angry baby into a calm and peaceful one.

Read: 8 Reasons You Have A Whiny Baby

Habits That Make Babies Angry

Some babies are more spirited than others. Some are “angel babies” or “textbook babies” and are more or less easy to calm.

Other babies have witching hours all day long. Or, they are super fussy and want to feed every hour all day long. This drives mothers bananas.

Here are some habits that contribute to baby being angry and irritable, day or night.

Over-tiredness

Some moms seriously underestimate the amount of time in a day that babies need to sleep. It’s actually shocking how much sleep they need.

If your little one has gone more than an hour or two (up until about 3 months of age) or more than a few hours (up until about a year) without sleeping… they are probably angry because they’re tired.

Keeping baby up longer will not make baby sleep better, it will make them sleep worse. If your baby yawns, rubs their eyes, stares off into space, or has been up for a while then assume they’re tired.

In that case, do not do a long wind down routine, do not run errands, put baby immediately in bed.

Pain & Discomfort

It goes without saying that pain and discomfort make babies angry. Pain and discomfort makes all of us angry.

Read: 12 Medical Reasons Why Your Baby’s Not Sleeping (With Symptoms of Each)

Maybe you have hyper-lactation or baby has reflux, there could be some teething going on, or even an ear ache.

⭐ The general rule of thumb is this: if you offer pain relief to baby and they start acting normal… start digging deeper.

It’s a good idea to eliminate pain, discomfort, or illness as reasons for baby’s mood before you start making some big changes. If baby has an ear ache, for example, you won’t get very far with sleep independence.

Read: 7 Simple Reasons Why Your Baby Won’t Nap & What To Do

Over-stimulation

When the lights, sounds, and loving cuddles from siblings gets too much, babies can become angry and agitated. Babies love being around family members and often thrive in the fresh air!

But, like adults, it can get overwhelming. If you notice baby starts looking away from those playing with them or crying, you can try a few things.

Tell the sibling to move physically away a bit, to give baby some space
Turn the lights down slightly. Bright lights are good associations to help reverse day night confusion, but if there is noise, bright lights, loud siblings, etc. all together it can be too much.
Establish a consistent wind down routine for baby. Don’t just take a baby from a loud room to a quiet one and put him in the crib. Instead, do a wind down routine to help baby transition from active play into sleep mode.

baby sleeping on daddy's chest after angry tantrum

Because you won’t leave baby alone

Here’s one situation that often occurs and it confuses moms. Here’s what happens

Mom puts baby to bed, and baby is crying. Mom picks up baby and tries to rock her and shush and hold her to calm her down. Baby starts arching her back angrily, and gets fussier and fussier.

Mom gets distressed and then says, “Okay, forget it, we’ll try again later,” and then calls naptime quits.

THIS IS EXACTLY THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN.

Babies arch their back and fight moms at bedtime because they are trying get to sleep. They are working off steam and, typically, if you put baby back down and let them get back to it, they’ll drift off to sleep in no time.

Babies need sleep and if they are trying to get to sleep and mom keeps interfering because she’s worried baby’s cries are damaging them… you’ll create a cycle of exhaustion.

Read: 7 Simple Reasons Why Your Baby Won’t Nap & What To Do

Baby’s hot or cold

I’ll never forget when my baby started waking up every night for days. He was inconsolable and I was getting frantic!

Finally, one morning I had a thought… could he be cold?

That night, I gave him an extra layer or two. And guess what? No more night wakings! Generally speaking, babies need about one more layer than we adults do.

If baby is too hot (it’s a SIDS hazard) or too cold, they’ll be upset. The optimal temperature as per the American Academy of Pediatrics is between 68 and 72 degrees.

Baby needs a better, more consistent routine

Moms may not like routines, but babies do.

You don’t have to watch the clock all day, but still, babies like predictability. And, truth be told, when you get into a good routine, baby’s mood improves so significantly that you end up liking the routine too.

Age appropriate routines have the following habits

Feeding times that are regular and predictable
Nap times that are predictable, without too much gap between
An early enough bedtime that baby gets all those before midnight restorative hours of sleep (babies often wake up earlier in the mornings the later they go to bed)

FAQs on angry baby behavior

Why do babies get angry?

Babies can get agitated, overwhelmed, and over-stimulated which can result in their appearing angry or out of control. This can be overtiredness, pain, over-stimulation, or frustration. The key to preventing this type of behavior (medical issues aside) is enough food, enough rest, and enough nurture.

Is it normal to be frustrated with babies?

Yes! The key is to make sure that you are meeting your baby’s need for food and sleep in a healthy way so they are content. When baby is content, you are content. If you are worn out and frustrated and baby is crying a lot, you may need some support to help you calm down and be the mom you want to be.

At what age do babies start feeling emotions?

Babies are human from conception! They will have physical reactions and physiological reactions as soon as they are born, and emotions will come as a result of that. They will smile when happy by 2 or 3 months, cry when frustrated, etc.

Simple Baby Advice That Stands the Test of Time

Inside you’ll find simple and easy to implement baby advice that has stood the test of time. This adds on well to my newborn baby needs post.

A little over 9 years ago, I was pregnant with my first child.

We lived in Scotland at the time, and it’s typical in Scotland to go to a midwife instead of a nurse or a doctor. She gave a packet of information that was full of stuff that I had no idea about.

One of the things that this packet suggested was that you put baby to sleep on their back. This is one of the biggest ways that Scotland had cut down the number of occurrences of SID.

I remember telling this to everyone, and so many people said, “Back in my day, you put babies to sleep on their stomachs so that if they threw up, they didn’t swallow it. Now you put them to sleep on their back. You slept on your stomach and you were fine.“

For a while, it was confusing because, what do you listen to?

Many times, the old advice and traditional ways of doing things work well. But then, new research comes out and you want to do the next best practice.

However, some baby advice has stood the test of time and not changed for decades! Let’s talk about those things..

The best baby advice you need when starting out as a mom.

Simple Baby Advice That Stands the Test of Time

Here are some classic, best practices that have stood the test of time. With this baby advice, you’re sure to have a peaceful time with new baby!

Meet Baby’s Needs Predictably

The first thing is to meet baby’s needs predictably. You baby will need this reliability to establish a proper routine and be able to soothe.

If you don’t choose how and when to meet baby’s needs with regularity you’ll end up trying to interpret baby’s cries all day long. You don’t need to be at the mercy of trying to guess what baby needs.

You know what baby needs. Give it to her before she has to cry for it.

Read: Cocooning a Newborn & 7 Reasons Why it Can Be Good For The Family

Baby advice to meet needs predictably:

Feed them full feeds so their tummies are full
Put them down to nap when it’s time for them to nap
Change their diapers and keep them at an appropriate temperature
Give plenty of cuddles and hugs (why science says you must hug your littles)

If you do these things predictably, you’ll cut down on crying and fussing significantly. In fact, you’ll end up with a baby that cries very little.

I’ve had people comment on all five of my babies peaceful demeanor. It was simply because I met the baby’s needs in a predictable way which meant baby didn’t need to cry.

I knew when it was time for baby to feed and I would feed them. When it was time for baby to sleep, I would put them down for a nap.

They were well fed and well rested and they didn’t need to fuss.

Read: Get A Tired Baby To Sleep — In 4 Simple Steps

Family Practices & Contribution

0-5

Sleep Little Lamb (Ages 0-5)

Moms will walk away with a step-by-step sleep plan tailored to their child’s age and needs, designed to improve sleep within 3 days to 2 weeks.

Start Now

baby advice that you'll need as a new mom

Do Not Forsake Routine

Research is unanimous.

There has not been a single study come out by a reputable source on baby advice that says that routine is not good for babies. It has all shown that for babies, toddlers, preschoolers, and children on up, routines are key.

Routines bring security, stability, and predictability. Routines help your baby know what’s coming next.

If you feed your baby around 3 p.m. on a regular basis, Baby soon begins waking at 3 p.m. ready to feed. Baby’s metabolism begins to adjust to the routine you have established. Days become predictable, peaceful, and you don’t have to guess what baby needs.

Although interruptions do happen, when you have a routine, you begin to recognize what baby needs.

Baby’s crying, but this is when we normally feed so he’s probably hungry.
Baby’s rubbing getting a bit fussy and rubbing his eyes. This is when I normally put them down for a rest so I know he’s tired.

Keeping a routine helps you to meet your baby’s exact needs in a timely manner without the mystery. Because you meet his/her needs with regularity you get tuned into baby’s needs in an eerily accurate way.

Now, that’s good baby advice!

Read: Want an Easy Baby? Then Use A Foolproof Baby Schedule

baby advice that every mother needs to know

Protect Those First Few Months

In the past when women had babies they would often stay in confinement for months after delivery. Recovering, recuperating, and taking care of baby were key priorities.

Nowadays, people have a baby and three days later – they’re up and at ’em and busy again. To a certain extent this can’t be avoided. Life does go on, especially if you have a few young children close in age.

While you don’t need to lock yourself in the nursery for three months, it is important you establish a rhythm and routine with your baby. That you learn to nurture, feed, and bond.

It takes a while to get used to the new family dynamics. You must learn how baby feeds, how baby rests, what makes baby comfortable, and on and on.

There’s no baby advice that can take the place of this time spent.

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Self-Care That Sticks

In this workshop, you’ll ditch the “I don’t have time” excuse and build a flexible, doable self-care plan that fits into your real life. Because taking care of yourself shouldn’t feel like another thing on your to-do list.

Start Now

Mom uses best baby advice for new baby at home.

And… if you have others at home, you must figure out how to feed baby while taking care of toddlers.

It’s important you take care of yourself those first few months. This is for both you and baby. Remember this: the first few months are not how it’s going to look in the next year, or the next two years.

It’s okay to take special time out. It’s okay to establish a good routine and way of doing things that will benefit you and baby for years to come.

Read: How To Mentally Survive The Newborn Phase

Start Out How You Can Hold Out

My grandmother gave me a great piece of advice when I had my first born…

She said, “Start out how you can hold out.” I’ve always remembered that.

Now, of course, there are things you do when baby is one month that you don’t do when baby is six months old. There are things you do with a six month old baby you don’t do with a one year old baby.

Start out how you can hold out is a general idea that says this… don’t start doing things that are crazy or unsustainable for a temporary solution.

For example, some babies fall asleep easily in the car seat. Moms can be tempted to take baby for a car ride every time he’s tired, but this becomes an unsustainable practice that is neither healthy for baby or convenient for mom. A better solution? Teach baby to sleep on their own. Then no one has to jump through hoops.

Tips to “start out like you can hold out”:

If you find yourself looking for shortcuts… back up and think, “What is going on? How can I meet baby’s need without starting a habit that will be extremely hard to break?“
Stick with the habits that work. If you have a habit or practice that benefits everyone, by all means, keep doing it.
When something you’ve tried fails time and again…If you find yourself doing something over and over again that doesn’t work and is making you resentful, it’s time to change it up.
Think long term and don’t be afraid to dig a bit deeper and find the root of the problem.

Read: Start Out How You Can Hold Out

Let Life Be Different

Those first few months with baby are just so precious…

Often as mothers, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to continue to all the things we did before pregnancy. We think we should continue to be everything to everyone in the same way we were before.

But that’s not realistic! You don’t have to do anything that isn’t healthy because… you are the grown-up.

It’s a false guilt that tells you, “You shouldn’t just rest and be with baby.”

Babies grow up so fast and those first months are very important. You have to figure out a new family culture, a new family dynamic. It is important to give yourself grace and rest during this period because you need down time to recover.

Connection & Culture

Setting Your Family Pace

Family life shouldn’t feel like a constant race. This workshop helps you build a balanced, sustainable pace that handles responsibilities while making space for rest, connection, and what really matters.

Start Now

Healthy ways to achieve this:

Scale back some commitments to focus on your family during this time. (If you aren’t in a healthy frame of mind you’ll find it difficult to be the mother you want to be.)
Enjoy this season knowing it’s just that: a season. (Those first few months and that first year can be extremely difficult if you don’t call a spade a spade.)
Accept the limitations that come with having a baby rather than try to push through, at the expense of everyone. (Let baby season be baby season!)

It’s just hard at first…

There are so many unknowns with baby, especially when you’re a new mom.

It may be comforting to hear traditional baby advice, but research how they recommend doing it now. Many things have changed over the years, and many thing, for the better.

It’s good to keep in mind that now, we have research for many things. This is a better way, even if it’s just slightly better. For a new mom, learning baby advice based on reserach can be helpful.

In the same way, there are many ways of doing things, that stand the test of time, that really have always been good for a baby, and will always be good for a baby.

That is… for you to:

Meet their needs predictably
Establish a good routine
Protect baby in those first few months
Start healthy habits that don’t require you to jump through crazy hoops and
Accept that this season is going to be different

You’ll feel more peace and contentment in the season when you surrender to it.

[amffh-sampleroutines]

Best Christian Marriage Books By Category (According To Reviews!)

Here’s a pretty comprehensive list (by category) of the best Christian marriage books out there. Marriage is hard, these books will help.

My pastor in college said something one time about marriage that I’ve never forgotten. It was a bit stunning at the time, and I wasn’t sure if he was being real or being cynical.

Sometimes, it’s hard to tell.

Now, 11 years into marriage I know it to be true.

This is what he told me…

When marriage is good, it’s the best thing in the world. When it’s bad, it’s a living hell.

a married christian couple holding hands

My hope and prayer is that your marriage *is* in a good season with both spouses looking to God for guidance and strength.

My experience tells me, however, that many of you will be struggling. In this post I’ve included books for good seasons of marriage, for strengthening seasons, and also books you never thought you’d ever have to buy.

“This is my command – be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
Joshua 1:9

Books to read before you get married

A lot can be said about planning ahead…even if its just emotional planning.

The following books will help you go into marriage with a deeper understanding of your spouse, yourself, and how to handle situations.

The 5 Love Languages – A must read before getting married, The 5 Love Languages outlines the secrets to love that last.
The Four Laws of Love – This book outlines the fundamental pillars upon which God designed marriage. The Four Laws of Love guarantees success for married couples.
The Meaning of Marriage– The Meaning of Marriage is about facing the complexities of commitment with the wisdom of God.
What Did You Expect?– This book redeems the realities of marriage before entering into commitment. After all, one day you will probably say: “What Did You Expect?“

Books on keeping purity within marriage

Infidelity is a sure way to have turbulence within a marriage. God’s design for marriage is one of purity and commitment.

These books outline and encourage purity, devotion, and love as it should be in a Christian marriage.

Sacred Marriage– In Sacred Marriage, the author outlines this concept: what If God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?
In Bed with Adam and Eve– In Bed with Adam and Eve is your guide to healthy marriage emotionally, intimately, and spiritually.
The Mingling of Souls– This book discusses God’s design for love, marriage, sex, and redemption. The Mingling of Souls deals with purity within a marriage.
The Armor of God– The Armor of God is a devotional book designed to prepare women of the enemies attack on flesh and spirit.
Hold Me Tight– The Christian marriage book Hold Me Tight tells of seven conversations for a lifetime of Love.

Books on prayer within marriage

Prayer is an important part of the life of a Christian and prayer within marriage can be a powerful unifier.

The Power of Prayer to Change Your Marriage– This Christian marriage book of Heartfelt Prayers is aimed towards marriage and how to look to God for strength.
The Love Dare Day by Day– This comprehensive prayer book, The Love Dare, includes a year of devotions for couples.
One– This 52 Weekly Marriage-Building Devotions for Thriving Couples is a prayer devotional by the same author as A Marriage On The Rock.
365 Days of Prayer for Couples – This Prayer Book is a limited leather edition and perfect for couples striving to grow closer to God through prayer.
The One Year Love Language Devotional- From the author of The 5 Love Languages, The One Year Love Language Devotional discusses prayer in relation to demonstrating love within marriage.

“Getting to know you” and fun books

Married couples sure to have a blast with these “fun date night and get to know you books.”

I have also included some couples devotionals that are sure to spark conversations.

10 Great Dates– The Christian book, 10 Great Dates, focuses on making room in marriages to connect faith and love.
Love Talk Starters– What better way to get to know your spouse then to read Love Talk Starters? It includes 275 questions to get your conversation going.
Fun & Creative Dates for Married Couples– Fun & Creative Dates includes 52 way to enjoy life together with a Christian perspective.
52 Uncommon Dates- This book of Uncommon Dates is a couples guide to praying, playing, and staying together.
Quizzes for Couples– In the activity book Quizzes for Couples, you’ll find fun questions to complete and strengthen your relationship with your spouse.

Read: All-Time Best Christian Books For Women (According To Reviews)

Christian marriage books on intimacy

It’s sometimes necessary to take a look at intimacy when it comes to a marriage.

This is no different for Christians.

The Unveiled Wife– This audiobook shows how to embrace intimacy with God and your husband. The Unveiled Wife will help you discover deeper relationships.
Kingdom Marriage- In the book Kingdom Marriage, the author discusses how married couples connect God’s Purpose with their pleasure.
Now You’re Speaking My Language– From the same author of The 5 Love Languages, Now You’re Speaking My Language deals with honest communication and deeper intimacy for a stronger marriage.
You and Me Forever– In You and Me Forever, you’ll journey through marriage in light of eternity.
The Intimate Connection– In the book The Intimate Connection, the author teaches the secrets to a lifelong romance.

Christian books for spouses dealing with a husband’s addiction

Unfortunately, struggles with addiction are common in many marriages.

Whether you or your spouse are dealing with struggles of addiction… these books can help.

Love You, Hate the Porn– Healing a relationship damaged by virtual infidelity can be even more difficult than overcoming the addiction. Love You, Hate the Porn maps out a way to restoration.
Sober Mercies– In Sober Mercies, the author discusses where to turn when what you’re trying isn’t working. This book is about how love ought up with a Christian drunk.
Wired for Intimacy- In the book Wired for Intimacy, the author uses science to explain how the male mind works in relation to intimacy and porn.
Healing the Scars of Addiction– This book deals with the Scars of Addiction left by drugs, alcohol, medication, shopping, pornography, and more.
Finally Free– In Finally Free, the author outlines fighting for purity and freedom from addictions within the power of God’s grace.
The Last Addiction– In The Last Addiction, the reader goes on a journey to own their own desire and what can happen for a life beyond recovery.
Pure Eyes, Clean Heart– In Pure Eyes, Clean Heart, you’ll read about a couple journeys through freedom from pornography.

Read: The Best Christian Children’s Books Teaching Biblical Values

Christian books for women in abusive marriages

Abuse can take many forms. Although suffering is not what the heart of God wants for marriage, it may be your truth today.

I pray these books will shine light on what you need to have peace and tranquility.

The Emotionally Destructive Marriage– This book is a must for someone who feels like something hast to change. The Emotionally Destructive Marriage shows how to find your voice and reclaim your hope.
You Are Never Alone– A best seller from Max Lucado, You Are Never Alone takes you on a journey through trust and the miracle of God’s presence and power.
Healing from Hidden Abuse– In the book Healing from Hidden Abuse, the reader takes a journey through the stages of recovery from psychological abuse.
Is It Abuse?– In this Biblical guide to identifying abuse, Is It Abuse?, helps victims identify and heal from various types of abuse.
Suffering and the Heart of God– Suffering and the Heart of God shows how trauma destroyed, but Christ restores.

Christian books for healing from affairs

Anyone who has ever suffered from unfaithfulness in a marriage knows how all-consuming it can can become.

Find encouragement, solace, and humility in the pages of these Christian marriage books.

It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way– This book will help you find unexpected strength when disappointments leave you shattered. It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way is written by New York Times bestseller author, Lysa TerKeurst.
Forgiving What You Can’t Forget– In Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, Lysa Terkeurst takes the reader on a journey to discover how to move on. This book also discusses how to make peace with painful memories and how to create a life that’s beautiful again.
Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken– The author of Healing Your Marriage speaks on finding forgiveness and restoration after trust is broken.
Rescued– The author of Rescued guides a wife through the many important pieces of recovery after betrayal.
Shattered Vows– Shattered Vows deals with hope and healing for women who have been sexually betrayed.

Christian books on divorce

Sometimes life situations can seem to have no rhythm, rhyme, or purpose. It’s important to know that you’re now alone!

Divorce is hard, but there are some that have gone through it and can offer some help.

Unraveling- This book was written for every woman who cannot believe their marriage is over. Unraveling discusses hanging on to faith through the end of a Christian marriage
You’ll Get Through This – A book by Max Lucado, You’ll Get Through This, offers hope and help for your turbulent times.
Something Gained– Something Gained offers teaching on the 7 shifts to be stronger, smarter, and happier after divorce.
Life Interrupted– This book by Priscilla Shirer, Life Interrupted, is about navigating the unexpected.
Healing the Divorced Heart– This devotional book about Healing the Divorced Heart gives hope and encouragement for those going through divorce.

Read: All-Time Best Christian Parenting Books (According to Mom Reviews)

Christian all-time bestselling marriage books

You’ll want to go ahead and grab a copy of each of these best-sellers! Enjoy and grow through reading these powerful titles:

Love & Respect– Love & Respect is a timeless book that has been cherished in many marriages.
The 5 Love Languages – You’ll come back to this one time and again! The 5 Love Languages is Gary Chapman’s best seller.
His Needs, Her Needs– A book designed to help build a marriage that lasts, His Needs, Her Needs, has topped the charts and helped couples everywhere.
The Power of a Praying Wife– This book of prayers is on the bestseller list for Christian marriage books. The Power of a Praying Wife is insightful, honest, and life-changing.
Love Unending– Listen to this bestseller, Love Unending, to rediscover your marriage in the midst of motherhood.

Easy Peasy Swaddling Tips for Happy Newborns

Inside: Here are some must know swaddling tips for newborns. Swaddling is a great way to teach babies the difference between day and night and help them sleep better. Who doesn’t want that?

It was like the second worst moment of my motherhood career… The first being when I saw my 2-day old daughter gasping for air. It’s okay… she was okay…

But this was almost more shocking.

I went in, for the 2,356 th time that nap, to check and see how Baby Girl was doing.

Turns out, she’d moved enough that her blanket (which I’d used to swaddle her) had come undone and was covering her face.

I died a thousand deaths.

I didn’t even bother being gentle and grabbed that blanket like she was on fire and there she was breathing just fine.

It was a super breathable blanket I guess.

That Was the Turning Point

That’s when I ordered a proper swaddle and said forget that blanket mess.

Clearly, I was an inexperienced swaddler.

But this post is not about how to or how not to wrap up your baby, but how to use the swaddle for maximum benefit. There are a lot of swaddling tips for newborns going around, but these are sure fire and work.

Read: How to swaddle a newborn safely in the summer (day and night)

Swaddling isn’t just cute, it’s very beneficial to teaching nighttime routines!

There are actually many reasons using a swaddle rocks, and here are but a few.

Swaddling helps teach babies day/night differences
Helps babies stay asleep during nighttime changes and feeds
It helps to promote sounder sleeping and prevents the startle reflex from waking baby
Brings comfort and closeness

Read: 8 Reasons You’ve Got A Whiny Baby (And How To Fix It!)

Family Practices & Contribution

0-5

Sleep Little Lamb (Ages 0-5)

Moms will walk away with a step-by-step sleep plan tailored to their child’s age and needs, designed to improve sleep within 3 days to 2 weeks.

Start Now

7 Must Know Swaddling Tips For Newborns

Here are the ways that I’ve used the swaddle with all 4 of my children.

We’ve loved every minute and didn’t wean until around the 5 month mark for nearly every child.

1. Swaddle Your Newborn From Day One

They swaddle in the hospital and my advice to you is: don’t stop. If you don’t start swaddling from Day One there is no time in which the baby can start “fighting the swaddle.”

Now, I’m sure there’s one exception here, but you get the drift. Babies who don’t sleep swaddled sleep less, wake more, and don’t sleep as deeply without some type of sleep prop.

Read: How To Get Your Newborn To Sleep Well From Day One

2. Swaddle Your Baby In A Swaddle That Opens From The Bottom

I personally prefer the Woombie and have owned 10+ of these at least.

You can pick which you prefer, but for optimal nighttime diaper changes (without fully waking the baby) a swaddle that allows the babies arms to remain swaddled while they feed and are changed is amazing.

At night, you’ll be signaled the baby wants to feed. From the bottom you’ll change the baby (leaving arms swaddled) then immediately re-swaddle and begin feeding.

After as much milk as you can get in, you’ll just put the baby back down to sleep.

This essentially means they “sleep” through feedings.

3. Do it as a “Sleep” Signal

Sleep associations are powerful things. They are positive associations your baby has with sleep that help them to fall asleep well on their own.

They also help them to calm down and know that it’s time to get sleepy. Or, if they’re already sleepy, to know that sleep is on its way!

Swaddling can clearly signal to your baby that it’s nap time and play time is over. What a beautiful thing!

Swaddle, cuddle, kiss, and continue the wind down routine. Then, when it’s clear your baby is ready for snooze land, put the baby in their sleeping spot to doze away.

4. Un-swaddle Your Newborn During “Awake” Time

Don’t leave them swaddled all the time, but use it as a signal for sleep. Even if your little one is tiny and loves swaddles, allow some room for free movement when they are awake and you’re playing.

This is true particularly as newborn when they are only awake short periods.

Play with their arms, legs, kiss their tummies, etc. Anyway, I don’t have to tell you how to enjoy your baby. By keeping the swaddle for sleepy times… you’re creating associations that’ll help your baby sleep better.

Read: Tips For Swaddling For Your Newborn Baby At Night

5. Un-swaddle Your Baby During Day Feedings

Newborn babies are notorious “snackers.” They are hungry, they begin to feed, they fall asleep at the breast in 5 minutes.

Now, this isn’t a problem unless it’s a problem for you, but it’s a big problem for me. I have other small children at home. Furthermore, I and am an only child – Type A – Confident + Take Charge mom. That means, for better or worse, I can’t feed my baby 5 minutes every hour for months.

For me, they need to take full feeds.

So, one way I help them stay awake during day feedings and get a little more wake time is by keeping them unswaddled.

I have even been known to take a wet wipe or cool towel to the bottoms of their feet or forehead so they’ll be awake enough to drink.

Read: What To Do When Baby Is Feeding Every Hour (& Not Sleeping!)

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Self-Care That Sticks

Start Now

6. Keep It On for Night Feedings

In contrast, at night, I try to keep them swaddled at all times if possible.

The trick here is to change the diaper pre-feed, the swaddling has signaled “go back to sleep” and then the feed itself helps them get there.

This is the #1 way I have found to train babies to sleep for long periods at night. This is possible, even as newborns!

In fact, as soon as my babies have known the difference between day and night, they sleep all through the night only waking to signal they’re hungry.

Read: The Dream feed: The Why, The How, & When To Stop

7. Keep Baby Partially Swaddled for Night Changes

I referenced this above, but by keeping them partially swaddled at nighttime changes – i.e. leaving their arms swaddled – you are preventing your baby from waking fully.

If you have a baby who is more “alert” at night than you’d like, I highly recommend this.

But keeping lights dimmed (or even using the flashlight on your phone which you know you are scrolling when you feed anyway) and keeping the baby tucked close, you’re essentially keeping them half asleep all night.

This woombie unzips at the bottom so you can keep baby’s arms swaddled while changing diaper.

Read: The Habit Most Moms Start While Nursing — And Wish They Hadn’t

A quick swaddle weaning tip for your baby

I do not have earth shattering swaddle weaning tips, but I can recommend using the convertible Woombie. It is specifically designed to swaddle wean!

With this swaddle, I have found is to wean your baby by taking one arm out at a time.

You usually know it’s time to wean them when they’re around 4 to 5 months or actively rolling over while sleeping. You don’t want a baby sleeping tummy whose arms are tied down.

If you’d like a copy of these tips sent straight to your inbox then sign up below and I’ll send them over.

Motherhood & Wellbeing

Weary To Well

This 10-day reset will help you uncover what’s wearing you down (spoiler: it’s not just lack of sleep), set boundaries without guilt, and finally create space to breathe again. Because burnout isn’t your personality—it’s a signal things need to change.

Start Now

The Fact of the Matter on Swaddling tips for Newborns…

Babies go to sleep better and sleep longer when they are calm, settled, and in a good routine.

It doesn’t have to be a huge thing with church bells and four part harmony…

The more you are able to protect your baby’s sleep, create a good wind-down routine, and make it a regular part of your evening, the better your whole family will sleep.

To recap, to help your babies sleep better at night you want to:

Prevent them from getting overtired
Choose an appropriate bedtime
Give your baby a calming bath or wipe down
Before putting on a clean diaper and swaddle, give your baby a rubdown or massage with nice calming lotions
Have some quiet quality time to help get your baby very drowsy before putting him into the crib.

If you would like to create a simple and easy wind down routine that anyone putting baby down can follow plus some BONUS baby sleep troubleshooting checklists, click here and get instant access.

How To Get Your Kids To Mind Without Lectures & Yelling

If you are struggling with disobedience, defiance, or children who don’t listen to what you say, here’s how to get your kids to mind without the fuss.

Do you find yourself talking… and lecturing… and repeating yourself over and over?

Then ordering, getting ticked off, and finally yelling?

And still…your precious angels stare at you in confusion, disobedience, or even defiance?

All in all, you want to get your kids to mind without lecturing, cajoling, or threatening.

While this seems like it should be easy, it’s often a challenge that requires our consistency and attention.

mother showing child how to fold clothes and do laundry

Getting Your Kids to Mind by Setting Them Up to Suceed

There’s a difference between telling a child a rule and setting them up for success to follow it.

photo about teaching childrent o follow rules

There will be times when you must explain or discuss a situation, but one must think of “lecturing or yelling” as a sign you are desperate to convince our kids to do what we want.

The truth is, lecturing and yelling at our kids doesn’t fix the problem… we just end up frustrated.

This is especially true when the time comes that our children understand rules, but disobey just the same!

With smaller children we should err on the side of more instruction and less discipline.

Let them wiggle out of chores? No way!

But avoid lecturing and losing your temper before you know they fully understand the rules. 1-year-olds will throw temper tantrums, but it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong.

mother at table showing daughters how to dry without lecturing

Steps to Getting Your Kids to Mind

1. Explain instructions, concepts and principles in times of non-conflict

If you begin to see opportunities throughout your day to explain why you do what you do, you can call upon it during times of potential conflict.

The best time to train your child to do something is when it’s not needed. Or when you’re not in a hurry. The time to practice what they’ve learned is when it’s needed.

2. Demonstrate your instructions repeatedly

It takes a while to master a concept. People learn visually, verbally, and hands-on. For whatever skill or behavior you are training it’s important to demonstrate what you are after multiple times.

Give children a chance to become exposed to the skill or rule, comfortable with the process, and finally confident in their ability.

Expect for it to take a while for your children to pick up a skill. Don’t expect your children to easily understand a concept upon first hearing it.

I often gauge when my children are ready to do things on their own completely – when I’ve shown them enough times – by how soon they start saying “let me do it!”

Read: What to do over and over again to get your kids to mind

preschooler vacuuming in the living room

3. Help your kids start the task if they are hesitant

As adults we prefer to give instructions and watch them being carried out. Just. Like. That.

However, this is not often the case with small children, nor is it the case when we are introducing a more complex skill to older kids.

Tips to help kids start tasks…

Walk them to the area and point at what needs to be done
Direct them to the area and provide the necessary tools to complete the job
Demonstrate the skill again
Show your confidence in their abilities
Praise them for their work well done or efforts made
Give your instructions and help them get started

Read: How moms can “work themselves out of a job”

4. Say what you mean & mean what you say

One of the most underrated tools of parenting (in my humble opinion) is simply this: keep your word.

This won’t be possible 100% of the time, naturally, but if we are people who mean what we say and do what we promise children are far more likely to obey our requests and heed our warnings.

If your consequence is a loss of privilege, don’t be too afraid to make your children angry. If you’ve established house rules, keep them.

The more you get used to doing this the less willpower it will take. It’ll simply become a natural rhythm in your family.

Read: 30+ consequences for undesirable behavior

preschooler playing with a dinosaur on the table

5. Refer to your rules or instructions, don’t lecture

One definition of lecturing is “a long serious speech, especially one given as a scolding or reprimand.”

We tend to sit down after an incident when our children didn’t follow the rules and talk… talk… talk. This doesn’t really work.

Read: Time In Vs. Time Out … and is Time Out Damaging Kids?

The trouble with lecturing our kids is this: if you’re to the lecturing phase they’ve probably already shut down and stopped listening. Young children probably don’t even understand you.

There’s an easier way.

When a behavior arises that is not good, or the opportunity for them to learn something comes up, recall your teaching time. By asking your kids to recall information you’ve already shared you will help transfer that information from short-term to long-term memory.

6. Use statements instead of accusing

If you’ve tried to get your kids to mind, but they aren’t…try using statements instead.

Examples of good statements…

This toy usually goes…
Doing this is a no no because…
The last time I did that, I…
Our rule about hitting is…
You’re not allowed to do this because…
Another way to handle this would have been to…

Instead of spoon-feeding them everything you’ve already spent time teaching them, you can simply use statements to help bring home the point.

Toddlers know they shouldn’t hit their siblings. Kids know they shouldn’t lie. Teenagers know they shouldn’t sneak out of the house. Lecturing ad nauseam will not help them internalize the things they already know.

By getting them to participate in the discussion, you aren’t allowing them to close up, shut down and ignore you.

Read: Got a disobedient child? Start here

7. Learn to discern insecurity with stalling tactics.

I’ve gotten pretty good at discerning when my kids are stalling, and when they are simply hesitating due to uncertainty. When they are hesitating they usually remain by me (are not attempting to escape the situation) and seem a tad confused.

I’ve noticed that 75% of the time when my children balk, it’s hesitation not defiance. They want to be helpful and do things that need to be done. Most of the time they are too engrossed in what they’re doing to have properly heard me, or they simply need to be pushed in the right direction.

They will often get distracted, but this is simply another opportunity for us to teach them to get back on track.When you find yourself starting to lecture, stop.

Read: Bedtime Battles: Stalling, Resisting & Requests

Learn to Balance, Stay Consistent, and Give Consequences

You can either yell, lecture them for an hour and ground them… or simply give them a chance to comply, give them a consequence and move on with your day.

We’ve established that lecturing and nagging will not get your kids to mind.

Try to articulate your thoughts in one or two meaningful sentences, and then be sure to begin explaining that concept in times of non-conflict.

Follow through and keep your family rules.

And if your desire to lecture is in response to misbehavior, go write it in your journal.

That’ll get it out of your head!

Toddler Behavior Stressing You Out? Reset With These Simple Tips

In this post you’ll find simple tips to help you address toddler behavior issues with grace and love. Post may contain affiliate links.

I was in Sam’s Club on the toothpaste aisle when I realized something…

If not for my 2-year-old… I might be proud.

My 4th child has humbled me, you see. During that formative time between 9 to 18 months when the beginning of discipline takes place… I was pregnant, exhausted, and Past the Point. Consequently, he’d received a lot of love and cuddles, but not a lot of direction.

As I was pushing him in the shopping cart on that toothpaste aisle – making our way slowly towards the Jumbo Peanut Butter aisle – he was Whining, screaming, and protesting.

Toddler behavior causing you stress? Reset with these simple tips. Good read for moms of toddlers.

First of all, he didn’t want to sit in that cart. Then, he didn’t want to have a “Happy Heart.” Lastly, he was going to go on and on and on until I gave him what he wanted. This was not the toddler behavior I wanted.

Why was this happening?

Because he was used to getting his way.

As the 4th child, he was used to his siblings, myself, or daddy doing his bidding as we kept moving about our business. Not that we’d been bribing or ignoring him, we just hadn’t dedicated time to teach him our family boundaries.

We drug him along while he was young and… now that he’s a full blown toddler, he wants to be dragged no more. He wants to make his own choices and that’s that.

He has come into his counter will,

Read: My “Daily Escape” to a Quiet Place & Why It’s Necessary

On that day, I went home that day without toothpaste and with a mouth full of crow. It was time to reset my 2-year-old’s behavior lovingly.

I realized that it was time to focus on my toddler’s behavior that had gone by the wayside in earlier months. Time to restore an equilibrium of trust, boundaries, and when necessary, consequences.

6 Basic Principles to Know about Toddler Behavior

It’s so true that toddler behavior can be wearying… but it can also be precious.

Toddler are precious, budding little people. They love lots of cuddles and are active and busy. It’s truly a precious season. It can also be a difficult season. One simultaneously full of joy and struggles.

“There was never a child so lovely, but his mother was glad to get him to sleep.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

1. Toddlers need Time and Attention

First of all, children crave their parents love and attention. They need eye contact, physical affection, and to have their needs met in a healthy and timely manner. Their needs are uncomplicated and instinctual.

Daily toddler behavior asks the questions on their hearts:

“Do you love me?”

“Do I belong here?”

“Am I safe?“

Giving your child attention isn’t rocket science. It doesn’t require expensive trips or toys. It can be as simple as a hug, a silly face, a dance party, and reading a book. Even if they don’t sit still to listen.

Don’t get caught up in the “how”. Just make time for them. Put down the phone. Smile, laugh and, in those little moments, let them know you’re there.

Connection & Culture

13-18, 6-12

Rooted in Family

Family life shouldn’t feel like a blur of to-do lists that leave you wondering if the memories are even sticking. This workshop helps you define your family’s core values and create simple, meaningful traditions that bring everyone closer without adding pressure.

Start Now

2. Toddlers React to Positive Praise

Praise is simply expressing your approval and admiration for someone or something they’ve done. When we slip out of the habit of praising our kids, the results are very negative.

Though a small thing, praise is powerful. It helps you child feel loved, appreciated, and noticed.

One of the easiest ways reap positive toddler behaviors like acting kindly, positively, and in line with your boundaries is to catch them doing well and praise them.

And, if your child’s love language is affirmation, praise will be particularly important. Read The 5 Love Languages of Children for more on that.

This may feel cheesy and hard at first. You may find yourself saying things like, “Wow, you really moved fast when you ran away from me!” or “What a beautiful design you colored on the walls. Why don’t we try it on paper next time!”

toddlers sitting on curb, toddler behavior

3. Toddlers Don’t Communicate Like Adults

Because little ones can’t tell us exactly what they’re feeling, pain often manifests itself in negative behavior, fussiness, and irritability. It’s our job as moms to play investigator.

If a naturally happy child is suddenly irritable and fussy there could be a number of options.

Teething
Earache
Headache
Stomachache
Undiagnosed food or environmental allergy
Growing pains

The list goes on and on. Uncharacteristic toddler behavior can often be linked to diet and/or other medical conditions.

Read: The Common 2 Year Old Sleep Regression: How To Overcome

It’s important to keep in mind that most toddlers have a very short attention span. This makes purposeful communication difficult.

I don’t know if your toddler will sit still and listen to a monologue for 5 minutes, but I’ll tell you mine won’t. In fact, I have about 10 good seconds before their eyes glaze over and they start trying to escape and go rub dirt all over their head.

How do we combat this?

4. Toddlers Act On Emotion…Not Reason

The frontal lobe of the brain is where logical reasoning occurs. The frontal lobe of the brain is not fully developed until we’re in our 20’s so… this is why children do not always act reasonably or rationally.

Particularly in an emotional situation. On the other hand, their limbic system is operating in full swing. And what does the limbic system control?

You guessed it. Emotion.

The reason toddler’s behavior tends towards tantrums and meltdowns is because their emotions are right under the surface.

They Feel All The Feels and, when in a heightened emotional state, are simply not able to be reasoned with. It’s why trying to talk your toddler down from a tantrum is pointless.

Using short helpful phrases are effective because they are quick, to the point, and don’t require a long attention span.

We use many of the phrases found in this book and they help teach our children the family rules and cut down on power struggles.

Motherhood & Wellbeing

If Mama Ain’t Happy: Boundaries For Moms

Boundaries aren’t harsh or selfish. They protect your energy, peace, and sanity so you can show up as the mom you want to be. This workshop helps you figure out where you need them, set them with confidence, and stick to them without guilt or burnout. Because when you hold your limits, everyone benefits.

Start Now

5. Toddlers Need Boundaries

Imagine starting a new job. You are given a desk, a computer, and told to report to work every day at 9:00 a.m. and lunch at noon. And that’s it. There’s no on the job training, detailed instructions on how to carry out your tasks, or clear expectations on what exactly you’re supposed to do. Or not do.

How would this make you feel?

Insecure, worried, paralyzed.

When children do not know what their boundaries are or what is expected of them, they feel insecure. In fact, the lack of boundaries is a major cause of insecurity in children.

They don’t simply need to know what not to do, they need to know what you expect of them. Discipline isn’t a focus on what’s wrong, it’s a process of teaching children what’s right, healthy, and best for them.

6. Toddler’s Emotions are OK

If your children are prone to whining, flailing of limbs, and drama… it can be tempting to get them to Just Shut It every time they emote. Obviously, After the 13th tantrum in 3 hours… you are so over it!

Consequently, you begin to see their emotions as the enemy. I hear you, it’s hard. But a good rule of thumb to remember is this…

Emotions are neither bad nor good, they simply are.

When we validate what our children are feeling and give them healthy ways to cope (i.e. hitting a pillow not their sister) they feel heard, listened to, and understood.

Please remember, it doesn’t mean we give in to their momentary desires to avoid a tantrum, but we acknowledge the underlying issue… that they are little people with big emotions and that’s okay.

Your toddler’s behavior includes emotions, but try to look past to what your child is trying to communicate to you.

Read: Curious Behaviors That Come With Toddler Teething

Back to my little guy…

In the aftermath of the Toothpaste Tantrum, we’ve fallen into a good rhythm. I communicate our boundaries, he tests them, and we deal with the consequences of his choices.

In fact…

Since being praised more often, he’s more confident and adventurous.

Because he’s being told “no” more often, he’s a happier child.

When given clearer boundaries, he’s learning to follow the rules.

He’s still a Big Loud Ball of Fire, but that’s a sign of life, right?

The #1 Secret for Getting Kids to Listen the First Time

It’s no secret, it isn’t easy getting kids to listen. They will throw meltdowns, tantrums, ignore you, or just not obey. What do you do? Let’s dig in! This post from my friend Brittany at Equipping Godly Women will show you how.

Your day has barely even started, and you’re already about to lose it.

You’ve tried to pry your oldest out of bed three or four times now, but every time you go in, he flat out ignores you and rolls over.

Your middle child is out of bed, but every time you turn around, you find him playing with his Lego set instead of getting dressed like he’s supposed to.

And your youngest child has actually made it down to the kitchen table (by some miracle), but is now playing with his cereal (and making a huge mess) even though you’ve told him to stop and he’s old enough to know better.

You’ve taken a deep breath, you’ve counted to ten, you’ve used pretty much every trick you can think of to handle anger towards your child, and yet, it’s not working.

You can’t keep telling your children what to do, only for them to flat out ignore you or wait until have a major melt-down.

Surely, there has to be a better way!

Thankfully there is.

First, let me assure you: If you struggle with getting your kids to listen the first time, you are not a failure as a mom, and you are not alone!

Getting kids to listen the first time is an extremely common parenting struggle that pretty much all moms deal with at some point or another. It’s just a matter of when and to what severity. But we all deal with it.

Read: Toddler Behavior Stressing You Out? Reset With These Simple Tips

The #1 reason you have a hard time getting your kids to listen…

You aren’t giving the right consequences quickly and consistently enough.

Now, don’t feel bad. We ALL do it. Even me. And I actually wrote a book called Teach Your Children How to Behave!

(Sound like your kind of book? Be sure to scroll all the way to the end for an exclusive coupon code!)

The good news is, once you know the problem, it’s way easier to fix it.

There are actually three parts to this, so let me break it down just a bit.

Does A Smart Child + Boredom = Naughty Behavior?

Boundaries & Behavior

0-5, 13-18, 6-12

Discipline with Dignity

Start Now

1. The right consequences for not obeying

Every action has a consequence, but are your consequences enough? Take your oldest child for example – the one who won’t get out of bed.

What happens when your child won’t get out of bed? …

Nothing. Sure, listening to you yell might be annoying, but it’s not much of a consequence and it just might be “worth it” for him compared to having to actually get up and get ready.

Read: 30+ Consequences For Negative Behavior

So, how do you fix this negative behavior?

You determine a good consequence – one that will motivate him to listen the first time.

Then, you stop nagging and let the natural consequences run their course.

For example, if your son doesn’t get up for school on time…

He won’t have time to get dressed. He’ll have to go to school in his pajamas (or, if that would be inappropriate, in the highly embarrassing change of clothes you have stashed in the car).
He won’t have time to eat breakfast. He’ll be hungry all morning until lunch.
He’ll be late to school. He won’t have any time to hang out with his friends in the morning and he’ll have to explain to his teacher why he was late.

Find the right consequence and you’ll only have to do it once. It will do the trick.

Read: The No-Nagging Morning Routine For School (With Printables)

Read These While You’re At It

Do your children have a favorite parent?It All Starts with You To Spank or Not to Spank… is that really the question?

Girl is screaming because mom is trying to get her to listen for the first time.

2. When your child doesn’t listen you need a fairly quick consequence

Now let’s consider your middle child – the one you have to tell to get ready again and again because he’s not listening.

It might seem like he’s letting all your words go in one ear and out the other, but the truth is that he’s smart.

He knows that when you tell him to do something, you typically don’t follow through right away. It’s only after you’ve told him four times to listen, your voice is raising and he can see that little vein bulge in your forehead that you’re actually going to follow through.

So he plans for this. He ignores you the first four times, and then listens the fifth time, before you get really mad and start handing out consequences.

Read: Siblings Fighting? 6 Simple Ways To Stop The Drama

Want to nip this behavior in the bud? Give consequences sooner.

Don’t give your children to the count of three before you follow through (or, if you must count, count really fast). Tell them very plainly ONE time, give them a time limit, and maybe one warning or reminder, depending on their ages. Then follow through.

Again, you only have to do this a time or two before your children catch on that you mean business, especially if your consequence is a good one.

Read: How to keep your eye on the prize (and how a rest is not a resignation)

Boundaries & Behavior

Loving Authority

Being in charge doesn’t mean being harsh or heavy-handed—it means being steady, clear, and confident. This workshop will help you understand what healthy authority really looks like. When you know how to show up as a secure, grounded leader, your kids feel safe, and everyone starts listening.

Start Now

Children fighting because they aren't listening to mom the first time.

3. Consistent consequences work best for children

Now, let’s consider your youngest child – the one playing with his cereal and making a big mess. What consequences does he have for his actions?

Well, sometimes you tell him to stop. Sometimes you take his cereal bowl away. But sometimes you simply ignore it.

You have enough going on in the mornings and sometimes you’re too tired to deal with it. Besides, it’s easier to just let it go and clean it up later.

Unfortunately, this inconsistency leaves your child unsure of what to expect. Sometimes he gets away with it; sometimes he doesn’t. He truly doesn’t know which it will be today, so he might as well try it and find out, right?

Consistency really matters or you’re teaching kids not to do what you say

This is why consistency in discipline is SO important. Without it, you’re basically teaching your children not to listen to you because there’s a chance you might not even follow through. And no one wants that.

So, how do you get your children to listen to you the first time? You find the right consequences, and you hand them out quickly and consistently.

Sure, it won’t always be easy. Your kids will test your limits, and they’ll change and grown and need new and improved consequences. But stick with it. It really does work.

Read These While You’re At It

handling babies and toddlers with jetlag

Traveling tips with small children

What To Pack For A Fun Stress-Free Beach Day With The Kids

If you feel you're about to lose it with the kids, stress or screaming or other things that are triggers for losing your temper or yelling, here's a great phrase to use!

“Give Me a Minute” – A Phrase For When You’re Gonna Lose It

FAQs on Getting Kids to Listen

What should I do with a child that doesn’t listen?

If a child doesn’t listen, he or she has been able to get away with what they want to do without consequences. To fix this, assign appropriate consequences for the disobedience. Then, be sure to respond quickly and consistently when this behavior is present.

How do I get my kids to listen and respect?

In order to assist listening skills and earn respect, you must be consistent with your directions AND consequences for disobedience. When you are inconsistent, you are teaching your kids not to listen. Remember to act quickly and fairly to any disrespect.

What causes a child to be disrespectful?

Unsureness of what to expect when being disobedient will breed disrespect within a child. This lack of consistency could be an inconsistent consequence OR a consequence that has been given too late. Children need quick and consistent consequences to be respectful.

Why is it hard to get a stubborn child to listen?

A stubborn child may have been given too much lee-way at the early stages of development and/or a lack of consistency when they disobey has caused them to reject rules. He or she is probably very intelligent and has figured out just how far you will go and what you won’t stay consistent with.

By the way – could you use some help finding and implementing effective consequences with your kids?

If so, then be sure to check out my book, TEACH Your Children How to Behave. Down to earth, encouraging and practical, it will walk you step-by-step through my exact strategy for doing just that!

Click to Learn More

40+ Ways Moms Can Help Their Kids Earn Money (And Save & Spend Too)

Want your kids to learn how to make money? Children can learn to earn money at an early age, and here’s how to help them manage it.

A while ago my 7 year old came to me with a problem.

A big problem for a kid.

He wanted to buy a LEGO and didn’t have enough money to do it. Ahhh…. I thought… a great opportunity. So I opened up the LEGO website on my phone and he scrolled through the sets until he found one he wanted.

It was expensive.

????

LEGO Tips for Little Ones, here are some ways to keep them organized and to prevent sibling fighting

I didn’t kill his dreams, though…

I said, “Well, okay, if you need that muchh money then you’ve got a lot of work to do.”

He readily agreed and spent the next couple of months working hard. By the time he’d earned around $50 he decided he’d opt for a less expensive LEGO, but the earning/making money bug had bitten him.

Before we get into ways that you can help your kids to make money, let’s talk about what the kids do with their money when they get it really quickly.

Teaching Earning, Saving, Giving & Splurging To Your Kids

When our kids earn money, they are required to save a little, tithe a little, then spend the rest. Here are some of the ways we do this.

When my kids earn money, I hand them over the full amount. Then I ask them to hand me back the saving and tithing portions. I want them to hold the money in their hand then give it back and see how that feels. Let’s be honest – it doesn’t feel too sporty – and they may as well learn it young and still get in the habit of doing it.
We choose a percentage to save (for future larger purchases, college, or whatever you choose, doesn’t mater) and a percentage to tithe. If you don’t tithe, you may call this a percentage to give.
I keep these two amounts in envelopes for each child and then we tithe them or use the saved money when convenient.
We choose to operate in cash instead of using one of the handy child allowance cards because I’m not convinced that will mean anything to a kid. I want them to understand money, amounts, change, and to feel it go in and out. They’ll have their whole lives for cards.

Now, let’s get at it. Here are some awesome ways to help your kid make some money, for whatever their goals.

Read: Why Credit Card Parenting Costs You More In The Long Run

Mom is handing boy money that she has taught him to earn.

How kids can earn money in their own home

All kids have different skills and abilities, but most will want to earn cash once that option is on the table. It’s important to choose “paying chores” for your kids that are accomplishable as well as more challenging for them. Kids can do normal chores for free, but earn money for more difficult chores.

Wash Windows- This chore can be time consuming and merit the cash earned. It takes a bit of skill and upper arm strength so that hard-working kid will earn it!
Organize & Dust Bookshelves/Office Areas- It’s amazing how dusty books and shelves can get.They may not be on our top “to do” list, but are sure to need a good cleaning from time to time.
Wash the Family’s Vehicles- If your kid loves being outside and water activities, this one is sure to be a hit. I recommend setting a weekly car washing rotation.
Organize Closets- If you’re like me, the pantry, linen, Tupperware, hallway, and bedroom closets can always go for a good override.
Groom Household Pets- Bathing the household pets can be a challenging and rewarding job.
Dust Furniture- Dusting on a regular schedule can be a very manageable way to teach discipline and consistency.
Rake Leaves- Especially during fall, this job can be a weekly chore.
Organize/Maintain the Cleaning Closet- As any mom knows, having a tidy cleaning closet is very helpful in maintaining a clean home. Assign the “paying chore” to better everyone’s cleaning experience.
Scrub the Fridge- This chore may not be a weekly job, but it’s one that requires hard work and attention to detail.

Read: How To Set Your Child Up For Financial Success

More ways kids can make money doing work at home

Practice Being the Junior Gardener- This goes beyond just watering mom’s potted plants. Kids can earn money by taking the responsibility of watering, weeding, and caring for their plants or garden area.
Clean the Porch- Porches always seem to need to be cleaned off. Deep cleaning this part of the house sounds like a good idea to me!Organize a Yard/Garage Sale- Have you kid do the planning, organizing, hanging of flyers, and cleaning involved.
Collect & Sell Firewood- This job can be coupled with land cleaning or assisting in clean up for a job site.
Make a Craft to Sell- This is good if your kid is crafty or enjoys making things out of wood, glass, clay, or art supplies. It may be time to turn that hobby into a way kids earn money.
Become a Laundry Helper- Collecting laundry from rooms and making sure the floor of the laundry room stays picked up can be a great way for kids to make money. Washing kitchen towels and rags are also examples of how this chore can be done.
Organize a Bake Sale- This can be organized and sold online, by a local store front, or even for a church function.
Can Food or Make Fruit Jellies for A Local Farmer’s Market- This opportunity has become very popular over the last few years. Some older kids enjoy earning money, meeting people, and making food.

Read: 8 Ways To Be Sure You Can Handle Financial Emergencies

how to make money as a child, kid counting money

How kids can make money working for others

Once your kids have learned some healthy money earning, saving, and spending habits… you may be ready for them to branch outside of the home to earn some cash. Here are money earning ideas, or at least where to look for opportunities!

Lawn Mowing– This is one of the oldest and surest ways for older kids to make money by working for others. Especially during the summer months, this job can a real money earner. If you’re thinking of letting your kid do this, read these Lawn Mower Safety for Kids article first.
Gutter Cleaning– Especially when it comes to elderly neighbors, this job can be useful!
Cleaning Boats/Campers– Make a flier advertising the cleaning of these items and pass out to your neighbors who have boats and campers.
Dog Walking– This job is more successful in city areas and can be a real money earner is done successfully.
Pet Sitting– Do you want to teaching reliability and general care of animals? This job can be done in your own home or by stopping by the house of the pet(s).
Wrapping Christmas Gifts– Your kid can make money by finding neighbors, older church members, or family members would value some help in wrapping their Christmas gifts.
Tutor a Younger Child– Kid’s learn well from other kids. Moms can help kids earn money by helping them learn how to tutor. Their teaching skills can be used to help other kids.
Teach Music Lessons– In the same way, older kids can tutor/teach younger music students.

Becoming a Mother’s Helper

Becoming a Mother’s Helper- Do you want to instill helpfulness and a willing to serve in your older child? Teaching him/her to become a Mother’s Helper may be a good option!

See the following posts for in-depth info on this job:

How to help your child get the word out about their services

As part of the learning process, moms can help kids earn money by also teaching them how to successfully advertise their goods/services.

As a mom, some of my favorite words to hear are “how can I help you?”– Start by teaching kids gratitude for the job opportunity and willingness to jump in and do their best.
Make Fliers- Teach how to use a word processor such as Microsoft Word and typing skills. Then, allow your kid to design his/her flier based on the service bring provided.
Word of Mouth- One of the most important skills for moms to teach kids about earning money is how to effectively communicate their service/ability. Proper use of manners, appropriate signs of gratitude, and overall professional attitudes will take them far!
Cold Calling- Talk about learning a communication skill. Teaching how to cold call their neighbor or family member can go a long way!
Utilizing Social Media- Assist your child by posting their flier or information about their service on your Facebook page. You can even post this information on a community board such as: local buy-sell-trade, garage sale find, and jobs in the area Facebook groups.

Helping your kids make money will benefit them for life!

All Posts

Other people’s problems are not your problems

There are 4 areas of your life to lose the mom guilt…

#1 How you feed is up to you

Remember…

#2 How you sleep train (or don’t)

#3 Discipline behaviors that matter to you

Here’s my point…

#4 How you structure your day

Bedtime Brain Release Sheet

Practical advice about structuring your day…

What actually works for you?

Mom Problem Solving Worksheet

Questions to ask children who are shy

50+ Connection Questions

Silly questions that will get everyone giggling

Dinner table questions… choose this or that

Questions to ask your kids about their life away from you

It’s like if I never would have asked, he would never have shared…

Q’s about kids’ dreams and the future

What is Parental Authority?

The Boss Covers

The Boss Empowers

This places parents in the perfect position to…

The Boss Promotes

The Boss Sees the Big Picture

Parental authority is seeing the big picture and making the important decision…

Parental Authority is a Blessing

If you’ve noticed your home environment is slipping into one of chaos, disobedience, and rebellion… ask yourself these questions:

I wasn’t about to lose this battle to my 3 year old.

It Just Got Worse…

50+ Life Skills (By Age!)

The Need For Control

How to Give Away Control You Don’t Need

Give Choices You are Okay With

Provide Choices Before Your Child Gets Resistant

Tips on Giving Choices to Help Defiant Kid

At First I felt Ridiculous…

Angry Mom CHECKLIST

No… she was straight up angry.

Habits That Make Babies Angry

Over-tiredness

Pain & Discomfort

28 Things To Do If Baby Won’t Sleep CHECKLIST

Over-stimulation

Because you won’t leave baby alone

28 Things To Do If Baby Won’t Sleep CHECKLIST

Baby’s hot or cold

Baby needs a better, more consistent routine

Age appropriate routines have the following habits

Routines To Cut Through The Crazy

FAQs on angry baby behavior

Simple Baby Advice That Stands the Test of Time

Meet Baby’s Needs Predictably

Baby advice to meet needs predictably:

Do Not Forsake Routine

Protect Those First Few Months

Start Out How You Can Hold Out

Tips to “start out like you can hold out”:

Let Life Be Different

Healthy ways to achieve this:

It’s just hard at first…

That is… for you to:

Books to read before you get married

Books on keeping purity within marriage

Books on prayer within marriage

“Getting to know you” and fun books

Christian marriage books on intimacy

Christian books for spouses dealing with a husband’s addiction

Christian books for women in abusive marriages

Christian books for healing from affairs

Christian books on divorce

Christian all-time bestselling marriage books

That Was the Turning Point

7 Must Know Swaddling Tips For Newborns

1. Swaddle Your Newborn From Day One

28 Things To Do If Baby Won’t Sleep CHECKLIST

2. Swaddle Your Baby In A Swaddle That Opens From The Bottom

3. Do it as a “Sleep” Signal

4. Un-swaddle Your Newborn During “Awake” Time